Freshman Year 1

Back to School Series - Freshman Year
Continuing my back to school series - looking at some ideas for freshman year. Some we have covered, but some are new.

My suggestions for freshman:

-1 Learn to say “NO” - over-extending yourself can keep you from your goal of getting an education and getting a degree.

-2 Learn how to study!! Sure, you ‘know’ how to study!! (Maybe not). High school isn’t college. It might seem easy at times, but keep in mind that you need to finish the classes.

Sure, you go to your room at (say) 7:00 p.m., turn on the TV or music, check your email, Google some information, text message some of your friends, check out the latest YouTube videos or Facebook posts, and read your textbook. At 11:00, you put down your books and congratulate yourself on four hours of studying. You maybe did an hour.

The suggestion is to get rid of distractions. No TV, and it might be okay for music – like soothing Bach string quartets!! Don’t go on the Internet (unless you absolutely need to); don’t go to email or Facebook.
There are many great concepts available for you. I’ve been looking at: https://howtostudyincollege.com/ and http://www.csc.edu/learningcenter/study/studymethods.csc and many others.

Almost all campuses have “learning centers”. Take a study skills workshop (early on). Learn how to take notes, learn how to study for tests. Invest in yourself!!!

-3 Plan, plan, plan your schedule - and stick to it
Allow some downtime – time for some exercise, a jog around campus, maybe even a basketball game or activity. But, the reason you are in college is to learn and to get a degree. Playing a pickup basketball game might be fun and a stress reliever, but does it help your learning and degree goals? (And, absolutely you NEED physical activity - so build that into your schedule).
Socializing is good, but watch your time. There is an old expression that is probably true (not true for all, of course) that college is the best four years of your life. After all, you get to live away from home, away from parental supervision, setting your own time – and (generally) letting somebody else pay the bills. I remember after my first semester, one of the best times of the day was after dinner in the cafeteria. A casual group would get a cup of coffee (which is where I learned to drink coffee – but it could be water or anything) and just talked.
Saturday? Sunday? Yes – you study on BOTH weekend days. “But there is a big home football game this Saturday” – okay, then get up at 7:00 and study before the game. “OH – my favorite pro team (in my case, the Green Bay Packers) are on Sunday night football – I have to watch!!” To be honest you don’t “have to watch” it. You might enjoy it – and if you allocate your time, you can take some time to watch the game – but if not, you can take a break every hour and check the score – and get back to studying. Whether you watch or not will not change the final score. Your cheering from your dorm room or lounge will not impact the game!!!

-4 Fourth – tests
Depending on the class, tests will probably be the main component of your college work. When the professor announces a test (and it should also be on the course syllabus), start them preparing for the test. What has the professor emphasized in class? What important concepts are in the textbook? Are there study questions at the end of the textbook chapter? Do them – ALL OF THEM. Get another textbook from the library (and yes, they should have similar texts for all classes) and go through the study questions and review questions. Study with a friend, quiz him or her on the concepts and then let that person quiz you.

I remember being so ready for my math class tests. I did all the assignments in the textbook, including ones the professor didn’t assign. I pictured myself (imaging) knowing all the questions, I walked into the classroom so prepared that I could almost have taught the class – AND – created the test.
Again, go to the Learning Center and get help on test studying. Essay tests will be different than multiple-choice tests and require really knowing the topic and really being able to write.
-5 EAT BREAKFAST
Some analysts have said that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Get up and get going. And others have also talked about the freshman fifteen - that many freshmen will gain fifteen pounds. Eat, get GOOD nutrition - don’t live on Cheetos and soft drinks. (Aside, while I do have some snacks in my house, I avoid sweet drinks and drink mostly water, iced tea or hot black coffee.)

More tomorrow about getting your college career started on the right foot!!!

Karen

Self Talk #2

Yes, it is Back to School Time - and today I am going to violate one of my principles.

I like Micah 6:8 “And what does God require of you oh man, but to Love Justice, Show Mercy and Walk Humbly with God!!’ The part I am going to violate today is the last - being humble.

Two days ago I wrote about self-talk - saying positive things about myself (or … yourself). So, today I’m going to say things that aren’t necessarily humble. (Of course, there is an adage - it is not bragging if what you are saying is true!!!)

I’m going to use two words today “I AM”. But trying to keep it within bounds, let’s put those two words in conjunction with what I think is God’s words for me.

Let’s start with Galatians 5:22-23: “But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

Putting that into the self-talk concept:

-1 I am loving and show love to others

-2 I am joyful and bring joy into other’s lives

-3 I am peaceful and spread peace into others

-4 I am patient,

-5 I am kind (and … I like the expression “If you can be anything, be kind”)

-6 I am good - and let my goodness fill the world with God’s Grace

-7 I am faithful

-8 I am gentle - even if I need to express something negative, I can do it in a gentle way

-9 I have self-control

And, continuing in this direction, looking at 1 Corinthians 13:4 - 7: “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”

-10 I am patient and kind

-11 I am NOT jealous

-12 I am NOT boastful or proud or rude (many just a little boastful at times)

-13 I do NOT demand my own way

-14 I am not irritable (because I am loving!!)

-15 I don’t keep a record of wrongs (I don’t carry grudges)

-16 I don’t like injustices (see the Micah 6:8 above - I am to love justice - not earthly justice, but heavenly justice)

-17 I DO rejoice when the truth comes out

With the help of God (as I see him or her), I really do want to strive to be patient and kind, to be loving and joyful, to show - inside and outside - peace; to be gentle and good and faithful

I AM these things

Plus - I AM an encourager. I can (and do) find the good in others - and encourage them to grow stronger in their own lives.

And, saying the following as self-talk - helping me to be a better person:

-18 I AM a great teacher

-19 I AM a great husband/father/brother/sister

-20 I AM healthy and I exercise regularly

And, maybe some thoughts that aren’t quite true YET - but I want

-20 I AM great on remembering names and faces

-21 I AM great on staying on task

-22 I AM a great tuba player and blend well with my musical colleagues

-23 I AM a great friend - attentive to my friends and to all

-24 I AM a great listener

-25 I CAN find positive things to say about everyone

As my classes start in two days, I am psyching myself up through positive affirmations and using words like “I AM”.

As the humorous and philosopher, Will Rogers didn’t really say, but is attributed to him ““I never met a man I didn’t like.” (Seemingly the real version was: “I joked about every prominent man in my lifetime, but I never met one I didn’t like.”). I claim that for myself - I like everybody - whether they like me or not. (After all, we are all made in the image and likeness of God)

WHO ARE YOU?? I AM all the positive things I’ve said above!!! (Or as one friend proclaims: God said it, I believe it, that settles it!!)

Karen

Self Talk

Back to School Series

Talk to yourself

Okay, very few will really admit that they talk to themselves - either openly - or internally.

We can be positive - or negative in our self talk.  I know I’ve had days when things don’t work well and I’m thinking (and saying to myself), “Boy was that stupid, Karen”; “You didn’t handle that well”.  

Psychology talks about “a self-fulfilled prophecy”.  When we talk to ourselves, we are putting powerful thoughts in our brains.  Matthew 12:36 says “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak.” 

Go around speaking good things.  “I can do this” is a positive concept.  “This is going to be great”. “My class this fall is going to be awesome”.  

My brain (and your brain) are like sponges.  They soak up what goes into them. It I’m pumping bad ideas into my brain, it soaks it up and says “You are worthless”; “You have no value”.

Or, I can talk to myself and pump good thoughts and good ideas into my brain.  “Life is good”; “I’m doing great”; “I am strong”; “I am healthy”; “I am financially well off”; “I can do this”.  

I don’t sing one of the Beatles songs (not that I don’t like the Beatles, but I just can’t sing “I’m a loser” - mostly because I am not a loser. I am a winner!!!  WOOOO!!!

Don’t talk yourself down - talk yourself up.  In Genesis, man is created in the “image and likeness” of God.  Hey, God (indirectly) made me - I am NOT junk, I am a valuable part of humanity.  

I also say positive things to others as well (like encouragement):

Proverbs 18:22 - Death and life are in the power of the tongue,

Proverbs 16:24 - Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.

Psalm 19:14 - Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.

Matthew 12:37 - For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.

Colossians 3:8 - But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.

Speak to yourself in glowing terms, be your best cheerleader!!!  Plus be a cheerleader for others. Let your tongue be a positive part of your life!!!

Like with your SMART goals, get going on SMART talking to yourself - tell yourself that you WILL accomplish your goals, you WILL WIN!!!

Are you positive - or negative?

Stay positive

A story I’ve told before.  In my first year of teaching high school math, I had a preparation period.  There was a teacher’s lounge and I went in a few times - to get a cup of coffee, to relax, to get to know the other teachers, but early on, I realized that it was a gossip pit, a negative place (plus - at that time [1969] you could smoke in the teacher’s lounge and I didn’t like it.  I went into the teacher’s lounge to get a cup of coffee and get out again.  

The human part of me wants to hear the gossip, to know the dirt (and sometimes to spread the dirt to others).  That is not who I am!!!  

Ephesians 5:19 says “Speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord,”

And … most importantly - speaking positive things to yourself!!!

Karen

Mentoring

Back to School Series - Mentors

Hey, Students (and others) - do you have mentors?  If not, you need to get going.

The first mentor you might have in college is your faculty advisor.  Most campuses have faculty that are assigned as part of their work expectations to advise students.  Now, some faculty are GREAT mentors, and some are not. You can change your advisor so don’t think this is set in stone.

Make an appointment to see your faculty advisor.  Drop-in during their office hours or contact them to find out when they might be available.  

Your first appointment is to get to know each other.  This is where you will present your long term thinking.  What are your goals after college? What are your goals for this academic year?  (Obviously, this works for non-college students as well. I found that I reached a goal to retire - and then didn’t have much for goals - just hang around until I die!!!  [Ugh])

Let your advisor know if you are thinking of an internship, or thinking of a part-time job.  If (say) you want to be a computer programmer, see if you can help with computer support on campus.  Maybe a local company needs somebody part-time with computing. Getting experience is very important when it comes time to get that first real job.  

Then follow up - maybe every two weeks.  (Hey, as a faculty member, my office hours were largely by myself - so having students stop by was good for me).  Don’t be a ‘toady’ - but let the mentor/faculty advisor know you by name. Something may come up for an internship or part-time job relating to your major - and you want your faculty advisor to remember your name!!  The adage of “out-of-sight / out-of-mind” is true. If you are in the faculty hallway stop by and say ‘hi’.

Now, you also need to know a bit about the faculty advisor.  What does he or she like? Are they into sports? Do they go to campus games, concerts, and events?  Do they jog or exercise? Do they have a family? This is a good time to practice your soft skills of making interesting small talk.  And … really be interested in this person!! Don’t just go through the motions.  

Your classroom instructors can also be good mentors.  They will get to know you and also should be open to working with you.  Of special interest to you should be instructors in your major field.

The data suggests that students change their majors with some frequency.  It might mean that as you take a class in a subject that you discover that this isn’t quite what you wanted or expected.  Talk to your advisor about your concerns about your major field. They might be able to help you out. Maybe everybody has trouble with a particular instructor and he/she might advise you to stay in the program - at least through the semester.

Some classes and majors do have a “flunk out” class (or classes).  If you want to be an electrical engineer major your first course might have a large number of students taking it to ‘try it out’.  

As your life goes on, you will need other mentors.  In your first job, somebody should be around to help you learn the ropes.  On other stages in life, you will need other mentors. And, along the path, you should mentor others.

Do you have mentors currently?  Have you had mentors in the past?  How have they helped you?  

Have you been a mentor to others?  Was it a good experience?

Share with us!!

Karen

Don't Smile until November

Don’t smile until November!!! (???)

Okay, that was advice to me when I started teaching at the collegiate level.  The meaning (or so I think) was to focus on learning - and let the fun and play come later. 

Dear Students (and all of us):

We have a goal, a passion, a purpose in our lives.

Now, for students that goal is to get a degree!!  It might be nice to go to the game, kegger, play video games, date and be social - BUT … you are here to get a degree!!!  (For my adult readers, that goal might be to successfully, competently, and pleasantly complete the work before us.)  

Aside, when I’m writing my blogs or doing ‘serious’ work, I can slip out of work and play a few games of solitaire or work on my German.  I can justify this as taking a little break. BUT … when the two minute break becomes an hour, I am just procrastinating!! Fun and games can come later.  If my day ends and what I wanted to accomplish didn’t get done because I ‘indulged’ myself with games and distractions, they it wasn’t a purpose-filled day.  

(“Hey, Get Your Blog written first” - then you can relax.)

My freshman experience:

I was scared I was going to flunk out.  I was going to go back home as a failure.  People would point on me on the sidewalk and whisper behind my back “he flunked out of college”.

I was so scared, that during that first semester at college, I didn’t allow for many distractions.  When friends on my residence hall floor (aka ‘dorm’) said - “Hey we’re going for ice cream”; “Why don’t you come with us to the concert?” “We’re going to the gym to shoot some baskets - come join us”. I said “NO”.  

For every hour in class, I spent three to five hours outside of class.  It was before spreadsheets, but I had a weekly chart above my desk showing times I was in class, studying, sleeping or eating - and not much else.  

I aced my first math test (and was the first one done - and that with double checking all my answers).  My other classes fell into place and I got great grades the first semester.  

I did have friends (including Jim from my hometown) that did flunk out and went home.  But, it wasn’t me.  

My campus didn’t have Phi Beta Kappa - the national collegiate honor society, but it did have the ‘Purple Key” society (the local version of the academic society).  I graduated with high honors and (of course), went on (eventually to getting a Ph.D.).  

But, I learned to say ‘no’ - I learned how to study.  And, after that first semester, I kept my grades high - AND - I had immense fun - as a fraternity member, Student Senate member, band member, and many other organizations and groups.

So, don’t smile until November is my keyword for getting the most important things done, and then smile, play, have fun, go out, socialize, and enjoy life.  

Steven Covey in “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” says “Put First Things First”.

Do you do that?

Karen

Network, Network, Network

Back to School Series

Networking

Okay, yesterday I wrote of Mentors - people that can guide you along the way.  Today is similar but with some differences - that of building a network.  

Throughout life, you will meet a lot of people.  Most will not be mentors to you, but almost all (especially the positive ones) can be part of your network.  

For incoming college students, you already have a little network.  You have your high school teachers, administrators, coaches, staff as well as friends in your community.  Frequently those friends might be friends of your parents. But, anybody that is friendly to you can be part of your network.

For example, you are thinking about majoring in accounting.  Maybe you can observe the high school bookkeeper over Christmas Break.  Maybe your parents are friends with an accountant. Again over Christmas Break you make an appointment and get to know them and the accounting field.  Hint - you will want a summer job and getting a summer job in your academic field is a great start on your career. Yes, you could be a lifeguard at the swimming pool - but working as an accounting assistant, as a nurse's aid, as a wildlife aid or almost anything can be a big help for you.  

Sticking with accounting as an example:  So, your mother works at some business where there are accountants.  She has a friend that is an accountant there. You talk with that person over Christmas break.  They don’t have a job - but they know an accountant in another business that could use some summer help - your network has paid off.

Maybe you are thinking of a medical career (a fast-growing field with lots of varying positions).  You know somebody from your church who works in a clinic. Maybe they know some lady who is taking the summer off to be with her family - and they could use a person, to take blood pressure and weigh patients.  You could work as a back-up health appointment/office staff to help schedule appointments and check people into the clinic.  

These days you will want to use LinkedIn to create a professional networking profile.  Then add people to your network that way. [I am mostly retired, but I have a huge LinkedIn network - and if I really wanted a job or part-time position, all I would have to do is connect with the right people. 

On-campus, there will be opportunities to network.  My last campus had speakers that came to the professional clubs on campus (like the Marketing Club, Accounting Club, Computing Club).  Be sure you attend those sessions and get to know the speakers.  

Campuses will also have ‘recruitment fairs’ - where companies come to campus to interview and consider graduating students for positions.  Go to those, even as a freshman. You might want to ask the recruiters what skills the company is looking for. Get out, get involved, get going.  

You might also consider your fellow students as part of your network.  You are from city A and your sorority sister is from City B. Your sorority sister’s father works for a company in your field.  Make sure you get to know your sorority’s sister when you have “Dad and Daughter” day.  

Networking is an easy way to get out and meet people and start to find out more information about your potential field.

I’ve been a part of many students’ networks - I’ve written lots of recommendation letters. 

NETWORK, NETWORK, NETWORK.

It isn’t always ‘what’ you know, but ‘who’ you know that can make a difference!!!

Karen

Do you have goals

Back to School Series

Setting your goals

I’ve written about attitude and purpose, but you also need to set some goals.

There is an old adage “If you don’t know where you are going, how will you know when you get there?”

Now - goals are things YOU can reach and are not dependent on others.  So, students, maybe your goal is to get an “A” in a class, but that might depend on the instructor and tests and other factors.  If you goal is to learn and do well on tests, those are (generally) factors you control.

If your goal is to become President of the United State in 2028, that is nice, but there are a lot of factors beyond yourself.  

I like SMART goals:

S - specific.  The more specific the better.  I want to lose weight - great idea, poor goal.  I will weigh no more than 170 pounds by October 1, 2019.

Specific goals also can work better with imaging and even payment.  “I will feel absolutely fantastic when I reach my goal of no more than 170 pounds by October 1, 2019.  I will reward myself with a new <something> - dress, putter, a fishing rod, computer, etc. I will look so great in my new <dress), or I will play better golf with my new <putter>.   If I don’t reach that goal, I will pay $200 to the <some organization you don’t believe in - like ISIS or the Ku Klux Klan> 

Specific goals can be broken down farther.  Maybe you want to weigh 170 or less by October 1st, so you could set a goal of 180 by September 1st, and 175 by September 15th - each being very specific.

For college students, you might set goals like:  I will study at least five hours every day (not counting class hours).  I will get to bed by 11:00 every day. I will sleep at least 7 hours a night.  And … but extra emphasis - “I will sleep at least 7 hours a night - every night until October 1st 2019.  I will wake up refreshed and invigorated. I will walk up and thank God for the new day and new opportunities

M - Measurable.  Is the goal measurable?  Yes or No. How about “I want to feel better by October 1, 2019” - might be nice, but is it measurable?  Yes, I reached my weight goal or no, I didn’t reach my weight goal

A- Attainable.  Can I reach the goal?  “I want to weigh no more than 110 pounds by June 1st, 2020.  If you are 6 feet tall and currently weigh 200 pounds, that goal is not attainable (or not attainable in a good way.  You can starve yourself, be hospitalized, but that is not an attainable goal. Maybe your goal is to weigh not more than 170 pounds by tomorrow (and you weigh 200 pounds now) - probably not attainable (or at least not in a healthy sense.

R- Relevant.  Does this make sense to you?  Now - that is a personal issue.  “I will pick up all the trash around my house/residence hall - every morning.” That is nice.  Is that relevant to you? If so do it!!

T- Timely.  The more specific (and timely) the better.  

SMART goals are intended to firmly PUT the goal into your brain.  They are to become a part of YOUR thoughts - and thus the achieving of these goals becomes a very important concept.

Do you have goals?

Karen

Don't be stupid

Continuing my “Back to School” thoughts

Don’t be stupid!!

In a week, I will teach my first class in three years.  On my class roster two-thirds of the students in my Introduction to Statistics are freshman.  

So, let’s think about this.  Two-thirds of my class are away from home (on a semi-permanent basis).  And, they are largely unsupervised. The floor RA (resident assistant) isn’t going to wake them up in the morning, check with them if they have been eating nutritious foods, or that they have gotten enough sleep, did some exercise, or even that they studied and did their assignments. Mom is not there to see that they are okay.

So, some of them can overindulge in “freedom”.  Some might drink excessively (after all, “College is The Fountain of Knowledge, where students go to drink).  Maybe they discover drugs (or they find that they can get marijuana easier - and Mom isn’t going to check on them. 

Now, being stupid isn’t only for college freshman - but for all of us.  Maybe you know of somebody who <ahem> drank too much alcohol, and shouldn’t drive home, but did drive home anyway.  (That is buzzed driving or drunk driving - neither one is good). The highway signs that say “Drunk Driving: You can’t afford it” are true.  The expenses are high, it will affect your auto insurance (for years). It may keep you from a job down the line as employers don’t want to hirer people with drunk driving records.

I understand that marijuana is fairly readily available.  While states are debating legalizing marijuana, there are still issues with altered perceptions.  And, as I understand it, some will find that smoking marijuana is more fun that going to class.

Or, how about an ‘innocent’ passion - that of gaming.  I know of students who will pass up meals, not sleep, and play games with enthusiasm - to the detriment of homework and studying.  

For all of us, stupidity is available in so many ways.  My spouse is out-of-town, so I can have an affair with a neighbor or a co-worker.  

Maybe I can just take a little of funds out of the till at the end of the day.  Maybe I can steal things from my job and sell them on eBay.  

In this day-and-age of electronic communication and instant posting of pictures, it doesn’t take long to post a picture of you being drunk or being stupid.  And it doesn’t even have to be you that is posting such images. It could be your best friend who snapped the picture with you wearing a lampshade. And, once it is on the internet, it is very hard to get it deleted!!

So, freshman - and all of us - don’t be stupid!!  Think where this could lead!!!

(Okay, a sophomore story.  In my sophomore year, I was an orientation leader.  It was great to be back on campus with great friends - and showing those ‘little’ freshmen the ropes.

One of our orientation events was a watermelon feed.  It was a nice event, but at the end there were several watermelons left over.  Somehow - as a group we decided we would take a watermelon (not steal) and go to a “Happy Chef” restaurant.  We asked our server for plates and knives, forks and spoons and proceeded to occupied a table and devour the entire watermelon.  The server didn’t call the manager (which was good as we probably would have been thrown out).  

Not the worst story - but one of group stupidity.  

There are other stories I could tell, but … maybe it is best to not show how stupid I have been in the past!!!)

So, for you parents with children heading off to school, convince them not to be stupid.  (And, unless you think it is warranted, don’t tell them about your stupid college days!!!)

Karen