Flag Day - and - Anniversaries

Flag Day - and Anniversaries!!!

Hurray!!  Today is Flag Day!!  Wikipedia says, “It commemorates the adoption of the flag of the United States on June 14, 1777, by resolution of the Second Continental Congress. ... In 1916, President Woodrow Wilson issued a proclamation that officially established June 14 as Flag Day; on August 3, 1949, National Flag Day was established by an Act of Congress.”

(Thank you Betsy Ross for making the first American Flag!!!)

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The title today is Flag Day - and Anniversaries!!  I am a bit reluctant to write this.

On June 14, 1974, Connie Walsh and Bruce White were married (so, today is our 46th anniversary - and probably our last anniversary)

On June 14, 1940, Helen Youtzy and Woodrow White were married (my parents)

On June 14, 1909, Stella Quaas and George Youtzy were married (my grandparents)

I thought it was a romantic, family idea to get married on June 14th.  It might have been, but every time we had an anniversary, my parents had a more significant anniversary.  At least we were off by a year.  When my parents had their 50th anniversary, it was our 16th, our 25th anniversary was their 59th.  

In my immediate family, there was only one divorce (an uncle whose wife supposedly had an affair behind his back).  Marriage was forever.

“"I, Bruce, take thee, Connie to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith."

(And change the names /wife/husband for Connie’s version).  

Marriage was a contract - a vow (and in some religious circles - a Sacrament or an Ordinance).  It was made until “death do us part”.  

There are the other phases: for better for worse; for richer for poorer; in sickness and in health; to love and to cherish.  I believed in those - and I still do.

My wife definitely has it correct when she said: “You are NOT the man I married”.  That is 100% true - I am NOT the man she married.  And, in reality - after 46 years which couple IS the same.  I changed over those 46 years and she changed as well.

Of course, in my case, God (or fate or my own selfishness) has allowed me to change my gender!!  The Great State of Texas has officially declared that I AM a female and that my name legally is “Karen Anne White”.  Yes, I definitely am not the MAN she married.

I am not going back through my thoughts and rationale for changing my gender.  I am HAPPY and I am at PEACE - and I feel God’s Peace and Love in my life!!  How can God, the creator of the Universe, still love me?  And, yet, I sense that He (or She) does!!  God is infinite - and I am finite (at this point - maybe I will be ‘infinite’ after death in heaven - who knows other than God).

I don’t blame Connie at all for filing for divorce.  It is uncontested.  She gets the house - free and totally hers to do as she sees fit with it (approximately ⅓ of our estate).  The remaining parts of our estate are split 50/50.  In terms of finances - that is about 65% for her and 35% for me - and that is okay.  Some people have said to me “Don’t let her take you to the cleaners”.  (But, maybe my clothes need to be cleaned!!!).  It is ONLY STUFF!!  At age 72, I know I can’t take STUFF with me when I die - and death is closer now than it was at age 26 when I got married.  Like the Apostle Paul in Philippians 4:12 “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.“.  I have learned to love more in the last two years than any other two years of my life.  

From 1 Corinthians 13

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

“And now these three remain faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.

There are many songs about love - “What the world needs now is love, sweet love”; “All you need is love”.  

Many times I have quoted Dorothy Day “I can only love God as much as the person I love the least”.  I am NOT allowed to hate.  

We have too much hate in this country now - we have gone through protests and riots about Black Lives Matter.  We find that politically we have two factions that profess deep hatred for the other side.  

I still love my wife - and maybe more than on that day 46 years ago.  Love in the “agape” sense - the Godly sense.  In the past two years, I have said “I LOVE YOU” to many people - not love in the Eros sense (earthly, sensual, sexual), or even in the Phila sense (brotherly love) - but in that deep Godly love!!!  I AM TO LOVE!!!!!!

Happy 46th Anniversary Connie White - I do love you!!!

Hugs!!

Karen