TUESDAY, MAY 17, 2022 - MENTAL HEALTH MONTH - DAY 2

 TUESDAY, MAY 17, 2022 - MENTAL HEALTH MONTH - DAY 2

This is mental health awareness month.  Yesterday I suggested that we all can have tinges of mental health issues from time to time - disappointments, hurts, and loss of a loved one.  

2021 Research says, “An estimated 26% of Americans ages 18 and older -- about 1 in 4 adults -- suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year. 

Fighting mental disorders are generally easier said than done!!

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GET HELP!!

After my surgery, with depression, and with gender issues in my brain, I sought help.  Between my wife and myself, we probably had over 40 hours of counseling (with normal counseling being about an hour).  85% of that time was for me.  I was lost and confused.  There were many factors, stress, worry about my health and my continuing health, fretting about money, and angst about our future.  

The Mind is a terrible thing to waste - was the slogan for the United Negro College Fund.  Yet we get ideas and phobias into our brains that are “doom and gloom”.  

I tried to walk two miles - down a mile to an elementary school and back -just a leisurely walk.  I think climbing Mount Everest might have been easier that day.  

My brain was grasping at the concept “you’re all washed up, you are worthless, you can’t do it”.

“Meaningless! Meaningless!”  says the Teacher. “Utterly meaningless!   Everything is meaningless.” What do people gain from all their labors at which they toil under the sun?

All things are wearisome, more than one can say. I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, chasing after the wind.”  From Ecclesiastes Chapter 1

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Thoughts of hurting myself came to me - step out in front of a speeding car, jump off a bridge.  I spent four days in a mental health facility.  While it wasn’t an instant change, slowly I adopted the LOVE WINS concept.  In my thoughts - GOD is LOVE, and LOVE WINS is an extension of GOD as passed through my brain.  

  

I first saw my PCP - Primary Care Physician - and said "I think I need some counseling help".  I seemed to be finding my “happy place” in a place I shouldn’t go (being a woman).  She referred me to a counselor in her system.  (Even with a very trusted PCP, I didn’t want to openly admit I was thinking such radical thoughts).  She helped me set up the first meeting with a counselor.

WOW - that was exactly what I needed. An honest, open discussion with a trained, certified counselor for an hour.  It just made sense!!   

I still meet with that same counselor once a quarter, but it was weekly in the past.  No - I am not “healed”; no - I am not perfect; no - I have trouble living the LOVE WINS philosophy.  YES - I think I am on the right road FOR ME (this might not be the road for you!!!)

Counseling was like somebody throwing me a rope when I was drowning.  I had hope again.  My life did have value.

The dark pit became lighter.  There was HOPE.  Those weekly sessions helped me identify things that were holding me down.  It wasn’t that my counselor immediately saw what I needed and like a checklist said “do this, do that, but don’t do this other thing”.  She listened to me, and she suggested readings for me (mindfulness, Brene Brown, Eckhart Tolle, others).  She didn’t press her views on me, but let me pick and choose what made sense to me.

If you are fighting depression, mental instability, and related issues - get a counselor.

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But, continuing today’s blog on Mental Health:

When you are in the pit of mental illness it can be a long journey back to mental health.  For me, I had to be open to change, I had to be open to trying some new things.  

If you are in the pit of mental illness, to me, it is like being at the bottom of a mile-deep well.  If you look up, you can barely see the light.  

My research has several suggestions.  The biggest one is if you are considering suicide, cutting yourself, drinking alcohol, or taking drugs to escape life  - get help - see a counselor, and talk it over.  I think it is better with a neutral person.  Talking to a spouse, a clergy friend, or a family friend seems to bump into hidden walls and crevices.  (Aside, a friend talked over a similar subject with a pastor who had “all the answers” and “none of the compassion”.  Note - there are clergy and others who CAN help - there can be different ways for a person to get out of that pit  ).  

Sometimes we talk about “reaching the bottom” - the bottom of the well, the bottom of your emotional life.  Getting out of your pit is almost impossible to do by yourself.  Get a counselor, go through a twelve-step process, and find God (however you perceive Him/She/It/The Force).

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Changing your attitude is difficult.  If you are by yourself and you are depressed and mentally ill, it is common to have a “pity party”.  “Oh, Woe is me”.  Start putting good things into your brain.  Find upbeat music, watch funny videos, and go to a sporting event or to a concert.  

The reality is that help is “between your ears” - but when you feed your brain garbage, you get garbage thoughts.

More tomorrow!!

LOVE DOES WIN!!

Karen

Tuesday, May 17, 2022