THURSDAY, MARCH 9, 2023, I MESSED UP AGAIN!!!

 THURSDAY, MARCH 9, 2023 - RELATIONSHIPS

I write from my experiences and my thoughts.  

I learn from my experiences - and (too many times), I have to repeat a lesson until I get it right!!!

*****

Have you ever had a “pity party”?  The “Oh Woe is Me” type event.  There are only three people invited - Me, Myself, and I.  And, we sit around and commiserate about how bad things are!!!

First - to wake my brain up, two things I need to remember.  (1) “In Everything Give Thanks for this is the Will of God”. (Ephesians 5:18), and (2) LOVE WINS.  (Corollary to LOVE WINS - it isn’t “KAREN WINS” - but LOVE WINS).

*****

Love, patience, forgiveness - yup - I have to keep learning those things.  I have this thing called “Ego” that keeps thinking it is the most important thing in the universe (NOT SO!!!)

We (Bluebonnet Philharmonic Symphony Orchestra) had two concerts last weekend.  I (me, myself, and I) had worked hard to publicize the concerts.  I had four groups that I pushed (antagonized?) to attend.  My work teammates, my bridge group, my Bible Study group, and my granny basketball group.  I had been mentioning these concerts for over a month, I distributed flyers, and I reminded them through my weekly “Bridge Brat Bulletin” and emails.

I (super capital “I”) wanted a huge crowd.  I wanted to look out and see an audience of friends that I had invited.

It was Karen’s work, not God’s work.  There was only one of my work teammates that attended, there were only three people from my bridge group (out of about 20); there was one (out of nine) from my Bible Study group; there was one (out of 25) of my church group and nobody from my granny basketball team.  

“I” (that super capital EGO) wanted more friends, more people.  The audience was very good for both concerts - but I wanted MORE (MORE, MORE, MORE!!!). “I”  (that EGO) was hurt - all MY work, all MY pushing, all MY effort.

“I” failed (am my EGO was bruised.  

*****

So, the three of us at the “Pity Party” survived.  We slept on it (all in the same bed).  And with the new day, We, Ourself, and I relearned the lesson.  Yes, “In everything give thanks” (even when I think I am so “big time”); and “LOVE WINS”.

*****

The “ego trip” of having a huge audience at the concert overpowered me.  As John, the Baptist said about Jesus - “He must increase and I must decrease”.  This isn’t Karen White’s world - God (however you conceive Him/Her/It/The Force/Oh/) is still in charge. 

There are times when I want to be in charge (what a disaster that would be).  There are times I want to be a “puppet on a string” - let God manipulate me - but He/She gave me (and all of us) “Free Will”.

Karen, you are such a weird “work in progress” - and actually all of us are “works in progress”.  

I was reminded of Dick Van Dyke’s song in Bye, Bye, Birdie - Put on a Happy Face:

“Gray skies are gonna clear up,

Put on a happy face;
Brush off the clouds and cheer up,
Put on a happy face.
Take off the gloomy mask of tragedy,
It's not your style
You'll look so good that you'll be glad
Ya' decide to smile!

Pick out a pleasant outlook,
Stick out that noble chin;
Wipe off that "full of doubt" look,
Slap on a happy grin!
And spread sunshine all over the place,
Just put on a happy face!

And if you're feeling cross and bitterish
Don't sit and whine
Think of banana split and licorice
And you'll feel fine

I knew a girl so glooming
She'd never laugh or sing
She wouldn't listen to me
Now she's a mean old thing

So spread sunshine all over the place

Just put on a happy face

So, put on a happy face

*****

Yup Karen - you are NOT in control!!  (Thank God!!!)

So what did you learn, Karen? I learned (again and again)

LOVE WINS

LOVE TRANSFORMS (and sometimes not quite quick enough for me <grin>)

IN EVERYTHING GIVE THANKS

FORGIVE ALWAYS

AND LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY

Karen Anne White, © March 9, 2023