WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 14, 2024 - VALENTINE'S DAY

 WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 2024

VALENTINE’S DAY

Ah yes, Valentine’s Day - a day to talk of love. St. Valentine helped lovers (there seems to be multiple St. Valentine figures). 

Shakespeare adds this comment (from A Midsummer Night’s Dream): “The course of true love never did run smooth”.  Many of our bridge players have had long marriages - but I’m guessing it hasn’t always been love and roses.  Some may be like Country Singer Lynn Anderson, “I never promised you a Rose Garden.” 

SOME VALENTINE’S JOKES

Why shouldn't you trust a pastry chef on Valentine's Day? Because he'll dessert you.

How do you keep a jewelry store safe on Valentine's Day? You locket.

What do elephants say to one another on Valentine's Day? I love you a ton.

Do you play soccer? Because you're a keeper!

Do you have a date for Valentine's Day? Yes, February 14!

What do squirrels say to each other on Valentine's Day? I'm nuts about you!

How do chefs show their love? They whisk you off your feet!

How did the telephone propose to its girlfriend? He gave her a ring.

Why were the scientists a perfect match? Cause they had great chemistry!

If I were to lay eleven roses next to you, you'd make the perfect dozen.

Is your name Chapstick? Because I think you're da balm!

You're like a dictionary… you add meaning to my life.

What did the flame say when he met the love of his life? I found the perfect match!

What did the farmer give his wife for Valentine's Day? Hogs and kisses.

I must be a snowflake because I've fallen for you.

Why should you never laugh at your significant other's choices? Because you’re one of them!

What's the difference between love and marriage? Love is blind, while marriage is an eye-opener!

Do you have an ice pack? I bonked my head falling for you.

You and I are like socks—we make a great pair!

If I were a cat, I'd spend all nine lives with you.

Are you a cat? Cause you are purrfect.

I think you are porcu-fine.

Your name must be Autumn because I am falling for you.

Don't worry about paying rent! You can live inside my heart for free.

You’re like my favorite card in a deck: the queen of my heart.

I dig you a hole lot.

What do pickles say on Valentine's day? Will you be brine!

What did one boat say to the other boat? Are you interested in a little row-mance?

Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me!

What do Italians say to each other on Valentine's Day? You’ve got a pizza my heart.

Why do you need a charcuterie board on Valentine's day? It’s the best way to say brie mine, Valentine.

SOME KNOCK KNOCK PUN VALENTINE’S JOKES

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Eyesore." "Eyesore, who?" "Eyesore do love you a lot."

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Juno." "Juno, who?" "Juno that you're the love of my life?"

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Honeydew." "Honeydew, who?" "Honeydew you know how much I love you?"

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Pauline." "Pauline, who?" "I think I'm Pauline in love with you."

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Olive." "Olive who?" "Olive you!"

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Justin." "Justin who? "Justin time for your Valentine!"

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Luke." "Luke who?" "Luke who just got a Valentine!"

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Frank." "Frank who?" "Frank you for being my Valentine!"

*****

YES - LOVE WINS (NOT JUST ON VALENTINE’S DAY)

YES - LOVE TRANSFORMS US (NOT JUST ON VALENTINES’S DAY)

Karen Anne White, © February 14, 2024