Monday, December 30, 2024

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 31, 2024 - NEW YEAR'S EVE

 WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 31, 2024

NEW YEARS EVE







HAPPY NEW YEAR

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I FOUND SOME NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS ONLINE:


Don’t only get your news from Twitter… try Facebook.  (Hey - that’s a good idea)

Learn when the final reductions go on items in the reduced aisle and build your shopping schedule around it.  (You know that day-old bread is still okay - until it has green spots)

Incorporate when free samples are being served into that schedule, too. (If you go to Costco, the time with the most extensive sample tables is Saturday and Sunday between 1 and 3 p.m.)

Set a goal to be vegan for six months and give up after six hours. 🍔  (I tried Tofu a while back - it was okay)

Live your best life and only buy bottoms with no buttons or zippers. (But it must have pockets)

Sign up for a marathon that you bravely will not run. (But, you’ll get a cool t-shirt)

Take up a sport that requires no cardio, like darts or dating apps. (Is watching sports on TV an exercise?)

Limit yourself to two minutes to pick a Netflix movie. If it’s good, you’ll feel like you’ve uncovered a gem. If it’s terrible, you’ll be asleep in no time.  (ZZ)

Unfriend every person who shares their unsolicited diet or exercise regimen on your social media page. (Have you tried the two-gallon-of-ice cream-a-day diet plan? )

Take more days off… It’s a no-brainer. (As retired folks, every day is a day off!!!)

Use the phrase “It’s a no-brainer” more often. (Reading the BBB is a no-brainer)

Do so much yoga (or Zumba) that it justifies wearing yoga pants 24/7. (Yes, I want to be like Vickie!!!)

Be OK with making more than one trip from the car to bring in groceries. The human arm can only hold so much. (I dropped a large tin of holiday popcorn.  When I opened it up, all three varieties were mixed together)

Add the phrase “Think outside the clocks” to your business jargon. (Do I say that to Nancy when she tells us to finish up?)

Use more business jargon in your everyday life. It’s scalable and robust and will take you to the next level. (Hey - “far out”)

Book that bougie trip, girl. (How about New Orleans for “Fat Tuesday”?)

Put on a complete outfit for Zoom calls (although bottom half-naked never hurt anyone).  (Be careful to stop your camera if you have to go to the kitchen or bathroom)

AND SOME NEW YEAR’S EVE ADVICE

1. Youth is when you're alloT-shirtstay up for New Year's. Middle age is when you're forced to. Seniors set the clocks ahead three hours so you can celebrate at 9:00 p.m.


2. What do New Year's parades have in common with Santa Claus? No one is ever awake to see them. (I do try to catch the Rose Parade)


3. What is a New Year's resolution? Something that goes in one year and out the other.  


4. My New Year resolves to see my cup half-full, preferably with rum, gin, vodka, or moonshine.  (Instead of prune juice)


5. What is the digital camera's New Year's resolution? 1080p.


6.  What do cows say on Jan. 1? "Happy Moo New Year!"


7. What do you call someone named Stephen on Dec. 31? New Year's Steve!


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We are not amateurs - but we are seniors.  Don’t drink and drive (you might spill your drink).  


Carry a bottle of wine with you.  If you get stopped, you can say you were at a prayer meeting - and Jesus turned the water into wine.


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And, if you have pets, ensure they are comforted if neighbors are shooting off fireworks.


HAPPY NEW YEAR 

MAY 2025 BE AN AWESOME YEAR FOR YOU (US)


LOVE WINS - AND ESPECIALLY IN 2025


LOVE TRANSFORMS


Karen Anne White, December 31, 2024


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