MONDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2021 FRIENDSGIVING

 MONDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2021 FRIENDSGIVING

Next weekend, I’ve been invited to a Friendsgiving celebration.  

(And, I guess I had missed out on this)

Friendsgiving is a mashup of the word “friend” and “thanksgiving” that refers to a large meal among friends eaten during the Thanksgiving season. The level of formality is dependent on the participants, but the word first appeared around 2007 as an informal replacement for the holiday typically spent with family.

Yes, I’m also going to Thanksgiving with my sister and family on the Fourth Thursday of November (aka “Traditional Thanksgiving”).  But, for the event next weekend I will have no relatives and, may only know about five at the beginning (but about twenty eventually).

I’ve done Friendsgiving before - but didn’t know it by that name.  In South Dakota, there was a year when a snowstorm/blizzard wiped our plans to go to my wife’s family in the Minneapolis area.  Likewise, other friends had their plans disrupted.  On a fairly casual basis when it looked like people weren’t going to travel for the holiday, that it just “happened”.  Friends knew other friends who had changed their plans to travel for Thanksgiving and with a few days lead time, all fill in place.  Somebody had a turkey, somebody made pies, others made the green bean casserole - and voila - it all came together and we had a great time.  In that case, we did it on the Fourth Thursday of November.  It was almost a traditional Thanksgiving but no relatives.

For that event, one of the people who was going to travel had a large home with a large separate family room for the kids and they became the hosts.  There were football games in the living room, and with some extra folding chairs, the men (mostly) ended up there cheering for the Detroit Lions or the Dallas Cowboys (or their opponents) as John Madden gave out turkey legs at the end of the game for outstanding play.  The kids mostly knew each other from school (Madison wasn’t that large of a community).  The ladies plied their talents in the kitchen and we had a great time.  (Other than the standard crabby kid who needed a nap, but refused to take one because there was too much happening).

*****

So, next Sunday (November 21) about 20 people will gather at my friend’s house and it will be a fairly traditional Thanksgiving meal (real turkey, not tofu turkey), and the fixings.  In that it will be in central Texas with the forecast for next Sunday in the low 70s, we’ll be outdoors.  

Actually, I went to my friend’s house yesterday (Sunday, November 14th) to help get things ready.  I brought a nice folding table (oops - no jigsaw puzzles this week), and some folding chairs.  She had some yard work that we did to get ready and some projects in the house.  The house is a log house with a loft - and so there are two toilets - one upstairs in the loft and one downstairs.  It promises to be a fun event.

*****

But, let’s take this further.  Maybe we (as a society) can expand Friendsgiving.  Encourage non-related people to get together - have some fun and eat.  I’m comparing Friendsgiving and Thanksgiving almost to the process of bears hibernating for the winter - we are going to load up on protein, carbohydrates, and beverages and await spring.  (Except unlike bears we are not going to really hibernate!!)

Maybe we could have a “ask your friends and neighbors in for a party” day - maybe in November or early December.  Maybe you can reach out and meet people.  I’m in an apartment building with 12 apartments.  I know only two neighbors.  (I knew more, but they have moved out recently).  I smile and wave at the others in the building, but we have our own lives and agendas. We could put humanity back in our lives - and for a day forget we are a mixed culture with different races, political, religious, and other views.  

*****

It seems as if “neighbors” are only people who live close to us.  And, it also seems that we don’t know our neighbors.

Do you remember when a new family moved into your neighborhood, that the existing neighbors brought food plates to the new neighbors?  (This may have evolved to “Welcome Wagon” kind of things - does Welcome Wagon still exist?)

My favorite Jewish rabbi of the first century said “Love your neighbors as yourself”, and when asked ‘who was my neighbor’ told the story of how an outcast person (a Samaritan) took care of a person (whom he didn’t know) who was injured on the road.  

Do we have that compassion?  Can we LOVE people we don’t know?  Can we help at the food pantry? Can we help with others in our community that have needs?

*****

Maybe this Friendsgiving Season/Thanksgiving Season be a time to reach out and be a good neighbor!!!  

LOVE WINS!!

Karen