SUNDAY FUNDAY - AUGUST 13, 2023

 SUNDAY FUNDAY, AUGUST 13, 2023

WARM-UP

I don’t need to do a ‘warm-up.’ It is already too warm!!!

Summer is neverending. There is too much heat and no rain in central Texas. In other parts of the world, too much rain and tornadoes. Hold on, friends. Soon, it will magically become September, and it WILL become cooler!! 

Our children and grandchildren (and, for some of you, our great-grandchildren) will be going back to school. There is excitement about back-to-school!! (And, this coming weekend is “Tax-Free Weekend” The sales tax exemption applies only to qualifying items you buy during the sales tax holiday.

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HUMOR/STORY

Two tomato plants grew on a back road in Indiana near the Wabash River. They were the best of friends. They would talk about life as they grew up on a gravel road.

It was a lovely place. Birds were singing; deer and raccoons crossed the road; dragonflies and butterflies would flit around the two plants.

The eldest (by just a couple of hours) called himself “Tommy Tomato.” The second plant called herself “Tina Tomato”  (It seems like tomato plants aren’t very creative when it comes to names)

Now their location was on the south side of the road under some trees. Their roots went down into rocky soil, and there wasn’t as much sunshine as they wanted. Tommy would look around the road where it seemed the earth was richer, and there was more sunlight.

Tommy would say, “Friend Tina, don’t you think we’d like the spot around the road better? The soil looks richer, and there is more sunshine.”

And Tina would reply, “I think you are right, but I’m happy just where I am.”

For days on end, this was their discussion. Finally, on a Thursday, Tommy said to Tina, “I’m going to cross the road and plant myself over there.”

Somehow (and I’ll admit I’m not an expert on tomato plants), Tommy pulled up his roots and gingerly crossed the road. Tina watched as Tommy settled into the new location.

Tommy yelled back, “Oh my, my roots really love this soil. It has more nutrients. It is just yummy soil”.

Tina listened and smiled back at its friend.  

***

Within a few days, Tommy was already bigger. The good soil and the plentiful sunlight were fantastic, and it spread its leaves upward. When it rained, the water pooled around the base of the plant.

Tommy yelled, “Come join me!!”  

Finally, the following Monday, Tina crossed the road and joined her friend. Tina pulled her roots out of the ground and stepped out on the road - and SMACK - a hit-and-run driver knocked her over.

OH MY!!!

Tommy pulled out his cell phone and called 911 - and soon, a vegetable ambulance was there and picked up Tina. Tommy got to ride along as they went to the Knox County Vegetable Hospital in Oaktown, Indiana.

Tommy paced in the waiting room while Dr. Asparagus and Dr. Onion worked on his friend.  

An hour became two hours, Two hours became three, and finally, Dr. Asparagus came out to discuss the emergency surgery results.

Dr. Asparagus said, “Well, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want first?.”

Tommy thought briefly and said, “Doc, give me the good news first.”

Dr. Asparagus said, “Your friend, Tina, will live.”

Tommy breathed a deep sigh. “Hurray!!! 

The doctor continued, “But the bad news is that she will be a vegetable for the rest of her life.”

<groan - end of story>

*****

MORE JOKES:

1. What do kids play when their mom uses the phone? Bored games.

2. What do you call an ant who fights crime? A vigilANTe!

3. Why are snails slow? Because they’re carrying a house on their back.

4. What’s the smartest insect? A spelling bee!

5. What does a storm cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.

6. What is fast, loud, and crunchy? A rocket chip.

7. How does the ocean say hi? It waves!

8. What do you call a couple of chimpanzees sharing an Amazon account? PRIME-mates.

9. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because she was stuffed.

10. Why did the soccer player take so long to eat dinner? Because he thought he couldn’t use his hands.

11. Name the kind of tree you can hold in your hand? A palm tree!

12. What do birds give out on Halloween? Tweets.

13. What has ears but cannot hear? A cornfield.

14. What’s a cat’s favorite dessert? A bowl full of mice-cream.

15. Where did the music teacher leave her keys? In the piano!

16. What did the policeman say to his hungry stomach? “Freeze. You’re under a vest.”

*****

UPCOMING DAYS:

National Book Lovers Day - August 9, 2023

Growing up, I loved books. As an adult, that still holds. But I’m finding that I like audiobooks more and more. Currently (the second week of August 2023), I have two audiobooks on my phone - but they haven’t interested me. But in July, I “read” about seven audiobooks. [I’m in a music mood lately and have been listening to Brahm’s Four Symphonies and Bruckner’s Nine Symphonies - especially the Fourth - the “Romantic”].  

I have some specifications for fiction - not too many murders, not too many unnecessarily being killed off. (I step back from James Patterson, David Baldacci, or Lee Child (Jack Reacher series)).

***

HERBERT HOOVER DAY - August 10, 2023 - National Today

Huh? Herbert Hoover Day is celebrated on August 10 every year. This marks the birth anniversary of the 31st President of the United States, where his legacy is honored and his accomplishments highlighted. Known as “the great humanitarian,” Hoover spent his life helping the poor and reaching out to the less fortunate, including feeding the war-torn citizens of Europe during WWI. This day is a continuation of all his good deeds, serving as a reminder that people should extend their compassion and go the extra mile in reaching out a helping hand.

Okay, Hoover was born in Iowa, and his birthplace is near where I grew up. (The picture is by Grant Wood - fellow Iowans - most famous for “American Gothic”) and is the “Birthplace of Herbert Hoover.” 

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Mountain Day - Friday, August 11  (nationaltoday.com)

I like mountains. Growing up, I read fiction and non-fiction about mountain climbing. I read about conquering Mount Everest and K2 (the second-highest peak on earth). I remember in my Freshman Year at Winona State University that I climbed Sugar Loaf. (It didn’t have barriers around it then.). I was stupid and didn’t have anybody with me - but I made it (despite wasps buzzing around my head). From Psalm 121, “I lift my eyes to the hills-- where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. Indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.”

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WORLD ELEPHANT DAY - August 12, 2023 - National Today

Elephants are neat. I remember the story of blind men meeting an elephant for the first time. One described the elephant like a rope (while holding the tail); another said it was like a tree (holding a leg); a third like a gigantic hose (touching the trunk); and another like a spear (with his hands on the end of the tusks).

NATIONAL TATTOO REMOVAL DAY - August 14, 2023 - National Today

This day was thoughtfully placed a month after National Tattoo Day and six months after Valentine’s Day.

I don’t have any tattoos (yet). I’m not sure I ever will have any - but I might opt for one on a whim!!!

*****

WRAP-UP

I’ve heard the weather forecasters say this could be the hottest days of the summer. Stay cool, and keep hydrated.

Be blessed, and be a blessing

Smile - and the world smiles with you!!!

If you can be anything, be kind!!!

*****

Karen - August 9, 2023