WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 23, 2023, HOARDERS

 WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 23, 2023, HOARDERS

I wouldn’t classify myself as a hoarder - but I might have hoarding tendencies.  

I have six toothbrushes in my bathroom, three in their original packaging. Whenever I get my teeth cleaned, my hygienist gives me a package with a toothbrush, toothpaste, and dental floss. But I don’t want to throw out my old brushes - they still have some use. So, I ‘hoard’ the new ones - in a plastic cup on the counter. Someday I’ll throw an old way away and use a new one.

I have five eyebrow/eyeliner containers in the bathroom. Two are almost gone. Those two came with six colors, and maybe I want to use one of those colors “someday” (but someday doesn’t come).  

In my defense (that is, I’m rationalizing my behavior). After my aorta surgery and being moved out of my house, as the divorce occurred, I tasted poverty that I hadn’t tasted before. I took Ben Franklin’s advice, “Waste not, want not,” seriously.  

Regarding the bathroom, I can squeeze the last bit out of a toothpaste tube. (I take a toothbrush or round pen and run it up from the bottom, pushing the remaining amount to the top).  

That leftover shampoo can be diluted and used for another three or more showers. (Hey Karen, you already buy the cheapest shampoo at the store.)  “Well, I’m saving a few cents by waiting a few days to buy again. After all, Ben Franklin said, a penny saved is a penny earned).

I know that deep-seated in my brain is an extreme worry about poverty. (So, I hoard things).

A source wrote this:

“If you think you may be developing a problem with hoarding, ask yourself why and how you’ve accumulated so much stuff and what purpose does it serve? Does all your stuff make you happy, or are you beginning to realize that your home is just a storage facility for useless things? Does another object or possession fulfill the same purpose? How critical is this piece to your happiness? If you think you may be developing a problem with hoarding, ask yourself why and how you’ve accumulated so much stuff and what purpose does it serve? Does all your stuff make you happy, or are you beginning to realize that your home is just a storage facility for useless things? Does another object or possession fulfill the same purpose? How critical is this piece to your happiness?”  (https://aspenclean.com/blogs/cleaning-tips/how-to-declutter-your-home-and-stop-hoarding )

*****

A friend shared with me about his aunt.

When Aunt Bernice died, we cleaned out her house. It was a disaster. Aunt Bernice was a hoarder. She had stacks of newspapers (at least bundled) going back maybe twenty years. She had National Geographic magazines - dating back thirty years. Her hallway to her bedroom and bathroom was one-way - because the stacks of papers and magazines were all against one wall. She had stacks of styrofoam cups in the kitchen. (You never know when you might need a cup). She had the church bulletins in the living room - in three stacks. About ten years ago, they had gotten too high, so she started a second stack, which was as tall as the first stack, so she started a new pile.  

She had an open cardboard box next to her favorite chair. In it were solicitations from various charities for money. It was a lottery system. If she went through the chest and a particular charity flyer caught her eye, she could send them a few dollars.  

My friend remembers hiring a small dumpster to through all the papers out.

*****

Okay, I’m not quite that bad (yet), but all my things have value. I know what will happen if I die in this apartment; my family will come in and throw it out. They might give some furniture to charity - but probably not much as it isn’t worth much.

But, hey, one person’s trash might be another person’s treasure. How about the “keepsakes”? I don’t think my children or grandchildren will want my high school yearbooks. Maybe they’ll keep some of the genealogy documentation.  

One article suggests:

“If you or one of your loved ones is a hoarder reaching out for help, one of the easiest ways to begin the healing process is to start small. Simply taking over someone’s house and throwing out all their things can be just as damaging as the effects of the disorder itself. Like other forms of mental illness, a slow and steady approach can be very beneficial to reversing the need to hoard.”  

If you were helping Aunt Bernice to clear out her house - while she is still living there, be gentle. Don’t confront or tell her she is making a problem by hoarding.  

Only do a little bit at a time.  

I’ve seen the senior I work with downsizing - which is tough - and mentally challenging. TL started with a whole house, but she moved into an apartment - with a living room, bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen area. Then she moved again into a one-bedroom smaller apartment with no living room or kitchen area. Her last move was to a shared two people room in the skilled nursing facility. There are two beds, two dressers, and two television sets. She is (maybe not formally) preparing for death. Her two sons have given away things, kept items of value, and shared things with her family. (I have a stereo with a three CD changer from when she moved). [Yes, I’m hoarding my CD collection - remembering what I paid for some of those CDs!!! They are too valuable to throw out!!!]

Yes, my brain is screaming, “Waste not, want not,” “Be thrifty,” and “A penny saved is a penny earned” -  

More tomorrow!!!

LOVE WINS

LOVE TRANSFORMS

KAREN ANNE WHITE, ©, AUGUST 23, 2023