Depressed for Christmas - part I

Depressed for Christmas

https://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20550695,00.html

Even at this happy time of the year, there can be depression.  But, it isn’t given. According to the article: “And while depression and the holidays don't necessarily go hand in hand (it's a myth that suicide is more common around the holidays; springtime is actually the peak), holiday cheer isn't exactly a given either.”

“Why? High expectations, money woes, and other holiday hazards can spell trouble for anyone, but especially those prone to depression—not to mention the social pressure to actually be cheerful, even when you're not feeling that way.”

Here are some of the suggestions:

1- Make plans ahead of time.

“Spend some time figuring out how to take care of yourself during this time, says John Sharp, MD, a psychiatrist at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, in Boston.

“Come up with restorative routines, such as reading a book or napping, and write them on a calendar. In between shopping and baking, make sure these routines don't fall by the wayside.

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Sitting around can really make you more depressed.  Keeping busy can help cover the blues. As the article suggests - make a calendar and stay with it.  Yes, there can be things that come up, but “idle hands are the devil’s playground” can be true. Keeping busy avoids some of those ‘bumps in the road’.

2- Avoid Family Conflict as much as possible

The article suggests: 

“Avoid family conflict as much as possible. 

If you know there are going to be conflicts, prepare a neutral response, such as, "Let's talk about that another time," or, "I can see how you would feel that way."

Then escape to the restroom, offer to help in the kitchen, or go hang out with the kids. And it always helps to call a good friend if you need a sympathetic ear.

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This year as we look forward to an active political year with the Presidential Election in November, families may be on different sides of the spectrum.  Let along the long festering situation with divorced family members, or even Gay, Lesbian, or Transgender family members. If you are the one that might be a point of conflict, try to avoid it.  If you are not the one that is causing the conflict, remember the reason for the season - the Prince of Peace. Love can conquer - and the old comment that “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.  Let love, joy and peace reign in your heart - and attitude!!!

 3. Focus on the good!!

If you need to, use the Pollyanna approach in “The Glad Game”.  Be happy you are not in a hovel in Siberia!! Be happy to be alive!!  Let your lovelight shine. There is an old story of two actresses that had not liked each other and somehow were cast into the same movie.  The one focused on the good of the other. She thought of the many awards the second person had won, the wonderful scenes the other had been in - in other words focused on the good in the other person.

4. Forget about being perfect

I am far from perfect.  I know some people (women in particular), who MUST have their homes exactly perfect.  They can’t entertain for Christmas as a guest might find a little dust in the corner of a room.  

I rarely think of ‘things’ anymore.  It is just stuff. Maybe I’m getting to be a minimalist?  (Maybe it being in a 582 square foot apartment!!!) In other words, if you come to visit me, don’t expect ‘perfect’ (although I will have vacuumed, taking out the trash, and straighten up!).

5.  Learn how to grieve

Maybe you have lost a loved one this year?  Maybe a split has occurred in your family and you estranged from others.  Don’t get lost in the grief, but keep positive!!

We will look more at this in two days!!!

Hugs!!

Karen