Second reflections (Cheap/Frugal)

One additional item in my review - Frugal vs. Cheap

Yesterday I wrote: “I have become very ‘frugal’ (read that as “cheap”).  With the divorce on its way, I need to watch my finances more.  Connie is getting the house and the rest of our income/investments are to be split 50/50.  My sister will tell you that I have my first nickel (not true).  I am coming to the realization that I am going to be okay financially.  I am becoming my mother (who, having lived through the depression, was also careful with money.)

My friend (KB) reminded me about frugal versus cheap.  Sometimes I am just too cheap!!!  I shop at the Dollar Tree (everything is $1) and not Dollar General.  I do watch some of the prices.  Last night, I got chicken breasts with bones at $1.29 a pound.  That will make several meals for me.  

One of my proverbial New Year’s Resolutions is to exercise.  This year, I walked about 950 miles according to MapMyWalk.  I want more for this next year.  I should be getting 10,000 steps a day according to sources - which is about 5 miles for my strides.  Over a year ago, I bought a cheap pedometer - that broke on first use (not the pedometer, but the connecting piece).  Last month I found a fitness device for $19.95 and bought it - to keep track of my steps.  It was made in China, not a brand I knew.  The directions were in Chinese for the first half of the instruction book, and English.  The first step was to plug it in overnight.  I plugged it in, and it didn’t light up, it didn’t charge.  So, I am back looking for a fitness device.  Some that I have looked at even prompt you if you are still sitting after an hour and can-do blood pressure, steps and more - and actually are brand names I know.  Maybe there will be sales on them in January.  

I did get some high-end Skullcandy Bluetooth headphones (about $130) - and the plastic strap broke.  I contacted them and sent it in and got a new pair.  The plastic strap broke on that one again!!  (Maybe I have a big head and I should just have the Bluetooth earbuds?)

I got a set of three cooking pans for $19 - and I love them (okay, ‘love’ is not a good word for cooking pans).  The small pan is just right for my oatmeal.  And, as mentioned before, I got a microwave!!

I have a friend (MN).  MN has to watch her money carefully.  But, she is extremely generous.  One day as we were getting cat food, a lady and daughter came by to get cat food for their cat.  Seemingly they only had a limited amount of money and were looking at the cheapest, smallest bag of cat food.  Mary, who is also very gregarious, soon engaged the lady in conversation and she eventually bought a large bag of cat food for the lady with her own money.

Likewise, a few weeks ago, MN and I were doing laundry at the laundromat, when a lady with a daughter was trying to stuff too many clothes into one machine.  Mary, again, engaged the lady in conversation and eventually paid for four washing machines and three dryers.  Maybe not big money, but it must have been ‘money from heaven’ for the lady and her daughter.  

I am ashamed at myself for thinking “MN, you don’t have much money of your own, and yet you are helping these people out”.  If you well, Mary was on a personal ‘high’ after helping others out - as that is her nature.

In the past, I have made coffee with just one scoop - and gotten hot slightly black water. I have resolved to use more coffee grounds to have better tasting coffee this upcoming year.  It is not that I can’t afford to buy coffee!!  I was being cheap - not frugal.  (Frugal might mean buying the store brand of coffee rather than the standard brands).  

I now reflect more on my spending.  Yes, my/our income is divided in half, yes, my apartment costs money (for my 582 square feet).  Yes, I don’t have television (but really friends that has been a godsend!!).  But, I need to be more frugal than cheap.  

I also need to be more generous.  I do have a monthly contribution taken directly out of my checking account for my church.  I am sorry to say (to myself and to you), that it is not 10% of my income (more like 5%).  I realize that I am being ‘cheap’ with God - and that hits me deeper.  

There are many good charities out there.  I do try to donate when I can - and do try to be careful to give to those that “do the most good.''  

God forgive me for being cheap - to you and to others.  Cheap is a negative state of mind.  

But like humans, I am good at rationalization. I give smiles, I give of my time, I write these uplifting and motivational blogs, I am an encourager - so what if I don’t give as much money as I should.  But, inside, I know that is just rationalization.  So, as a New Year’s resolution, I am promising myself to be more of a giver - money, time, service, smiles, encouragement, coaching, and more.  I am not an island.  It is better to give than receive - and I must give!!!

Sorry for the ‘down’ note friends.

But, I love you!!

May God bless you in 2020; may He give you prosperity, good health, family love in this coming year; and may He give you overflowing joy and deep/unfathomable peace!!!  AMEN!!

Karen