BB_March_18

 

BRIDGE BRAT BULLETIN

Thursday, March 4, 2021

HAPPY THURSDAY BRIDGE BRATS -  

WOW - it seems if we are moving along toward REALLY PLAYING BRIDGE AGAIN!!!  I think many (most?) of us have had at least one COVID vaccination.  Nancy and I visited yesterday.  We agreed that playing at Stone Haven seems ideal for us.  She has talked with Pat at Stone Haven and we have a green light.  So, the question is “when”?

Might we want a social event too?  

And, my theme for today - How to Play Bridge!!!  (I’m sure it isn’t true, but several of you have said “I’m not sure I know how to play anymore!!!”)

BRIDGE BASICS

“Since about 1896 bridge games have successively been the principal intellectual card games of the English-speaking countries.” (Wow - we are playing an “intellectual” game!!)

There are 52 cards in a deck - no jokers.  They are dealt out one at a time to four people at a table.  The two people opposite are partners.  

Bidding goes by how many tricks a team thinks they can take.  The first six tricks are called the “book”, so a bid of two spaces would mean you take eight tricks out of 13 total tricks (with the first six tricks laying the foundation.

With the traditional deck of card, each suit goes from Ace (high) to deuce (2) - (low).  (I was going to do a stupid joke here - about the four suits - there is the charcoal suit, the gray suit, the brown suit, and the tan suit - and ties are optional).  But, I think we should remember at least that much.

Thus in each suit, there are ten high card points - the Ace worth 4 points, King - 3 points, Queen - 2 points, and Jack - 1 point.  Generally speaking (each hand is different), if a team has 26 to 32 points, you should bid to a game (such as 3 No Trump, or 4 Spaces or 4 Hearts, or 5 Diamonds or 5 Clubs).  Over 32 you should be thinking about bidding a slam (a bid of 6 or 7) - for a bid of 6 - you are bidding that you will take 12 of the 13 possible tricks (only losing one) and for a bid of 7 - you are saying your team will take all of the tricks.

For long suits (five cards or more in the same suit) - add one point to your evaluation. So, if you have five hearts and 14 high card points (like two Aces, one King, one Queen, one Jack) - you should evaluate your hand at 15 points.  

The two teams are competing - generally is one team is doing the bidding, they had the higher cards, but the other team should be paying attention to who bid what - to determine what other cards they had in order to set them (defeat them).

(Okay, reality check - after the first couple of hands, you are going to be thinking “yea, I remember all this).  

Our group is a “Social Bridge Group”.  Yes, it is fun to win, yes, we should bid to our appropriate level - bidding one spade and making six spades generally implies that you were underbid.  While that can happen, it generally is more fun if the challenge is appropriate for both the bidding team and the opposing team.  We do laugh.  And we do love each other.

BRIDGE BRAT GROUP

I don’t think we are going to set health parameters on our group.  If you have had two COVID vaccination shots, come on in.  One vaccine, but feeling good, you probably are okay.  No shots - but you made it through the year of a pandemic okay - up to you.  

Masks - yes, no, I don’t know.  I think all of society is still trying to figure that out.  Be smart and be safe.  We don’t want the group to come down with COVID because somebody spread it around.  We want to have fun, be intellectually challenged, and be together with friends again!!!

*****

FUN STUFF

As seniors, we need to understand some of the kid’s lingo when we text each other.  Here are some hints:

FWIW: Forgot Where I Was

BTW: Bring The Wheelchair

ROFL... CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing... And Can't Get Up

DWI: Driving While Incontinent

LOL: Living On Lipitor

OMG: Oy, My Grandchildren!

OMG: Ouch, My Groin!

IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?

WTF: What's Today's Fish?

WTF: Wet The Furniture

IMHMO: In My HMO...

RULKM: Are You Leaving Kids Money?

BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth

GTG: Gotta Groan

TGIF: Thank Goodness It's Four (Four O'Clock - Early Bird Special)

FWB: Friend With Betablockers

FYI: For Your Indigestion...

JK: Just Kvetching

TTYL: Talk To You Louder

MILF: Meal I'd Like To Forget

LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out

LWO: Lawrence Welk's On  (Is Lawrence Welk still on?)

MGAD: My Grandson's A Doctor

SUS: Speak Up, Sonny

WIWYA: When I Was Your Age

GOML: Get Off My Lawn

******

DAD JOKES: (not original with me)

What rock group has four men that don’t sing? Mount Rushmore.

When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, identity theft is a crime.

A guy goes to his doctor because he can see into the future. The doctor asks him, “How long have you suffered from that condition?” The guy tells him, “Since next Monday.”

What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!

What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!

What do you call a mac 'n' cheese that gets all up in your face? Too close for comfort food!

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere!

Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe!

What happens when you go to the bathroom in France? European.

What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire!

How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!

Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I'm not going to spread it!

Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?  They say he made a mint!

Last night I had a dream that I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram. I was like, 0mg.

A cheese factory exploded in France. Da brie is everywhere!

Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn't see that well!

What do you call a factory that sells passable products? A satisfactory!

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn't see himself doing it!

Want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it!

I went to a wedding of two antennas.  The wedding was boring, but the reception was awesome!!!

SPRING

Saturday is the First Day of Spring starting at 4:37 A.M. CDT. Technically it is the time when the sun's rays are directly over the equator.  Also technically it is a day with exactly twelve hours of daylight and twelve hours of night (but, if you look at the sunrise and sunset times, sunrise is at 7:36 and sunset is 7:40 p.m. - so twelve hours and FOUR minutes!!!)

Is there a difference between the first day of spring and the first spring day?

Do you like daylight savings time?  Would you (a) keep daylight savings time as it is; (b) never have daylight savings time (c) have daylight savings time all year.  

I haven’t seen any bluebonnets yet - have you?  I’ve seen some flowering trees.  My green beans are up and growing (in containers).  

The birds are creating a cacophony of songs in the morning. There are still a lot of downed branches from last month’s ice and snowstorms.  

The next three months (spring) are among the prettiest in Texas - before the heat of summer, and after the uncertainties of winter.  

WRAP-UP

So, here we are - one year into a pandemic.  We’re not sure when the pandemic will be over, but for many of us, it is over.  (Does getting the vaccine make us COVID resistant, or if we get COVID it will be very light?) 

Life is good!!!

LOVE WINS!!

Karen