SATURDAY MARCH 20, 2021 - SATURDAY STORY

 SATURDAY MARCH 20, 2021 - SATURDAY STORY

FIRST DAY OF SPRING

(Is there a difference between the first day of spring and the first spring day?)

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Marci’s Ethical Dilemma (fiction)

Marci Kirk was in the hot seat.  She knew the action depending on her vote.  And she was torn.

***

Marci (Adams) Kirk was the State Representative from the Milbank South Dakota Region.  This was her third term in the State House of Representatives.  

Marci was a graduate of Dakota State University with a major in business education.  She had taught high school business classes in Milbank before having her children.  Her husband was Mark Kirk, also a graduate of Dakota State University.  Mark had a major in cybersecurity and then had added a Master of Professional Accounting from South Dakota State University.  He was in a computer consulting company and was the specialist in financial and accounting security.

Marci and Mark had two children, Andrea and Caleb.  They both were grown now.  Marci had done tax preparation while the children were young and then worked with Mark’s company doing auditing and information security.  

Five years ago, Marci was asked by the district party leaders if she would be interested in running for the state legislature.  The position had been held by Cyrus Wright who was retiring.  She had been on the county party board as treasurer and was an excellent candidate.  And, yes, she was an excellent candidate and won her first term by a percentage of 55% to 45%, and in the second and third terms, she didn't have an opponent in the other party.  It seemed like she was considered to be fair and while party lines were important, Marci seemed to cross those party lines occasionally for what she deemed as just and appropriate.  

But, the issue before the state legislature was one of those controversial ones - should transgender youth be allowed to play sports on the team corresponding to their new gender.  So, a girl (who was born as a boy) could NOT play on the girl’s volleyball or softball team.  

***

But, the issue was hard for Marci.  Not many knew that Andrea had been named “Andrew” at birth and was assigned male at birth (AMAB).  By age three Andrew played dress-up and Barbies with his neighbor Ellen Thalen.  He had asked if he could be a girl.  For Christmas at age 4, Andrew asked for girl clothes and his own Barbie dolls.  He seemed to be happy when he was dressed as a girl but very sullen and unhappy when forced to be a boy. 

Marci and Mark did counseling.  Was this a fad?  Should they force Andrew to be a boy?  Should they cut off his relationship with his neighbor Ellen?  Caleb was two years older - and was “all boy”.  So in Andrew's fourth summer, Marci and Mark forced Andrew to be a boy, play as a boy, only have boyfriends, and have boy toys.  The counselor said, “Let’s wait and see - see how this plays out”.

But, it seemed like every day, Andrew just mopped around.  He didn’t like GI Joe, he didn’t like playing cowboys with Caleb.  He didn’t like his clothes.  (Some Days he would run around naked because he hated his boy clothes. )  And, almost every day he asked his parents “Can I be a girl?” 

In preschool that fall of his fourth year, he played with the girls almost exclusively.  He somehow called himself “Andrea” instead of Andrew.  His teachers said “No, your name is Andrew” and he would correct them and say “My Name is Andrea”.  

Days that Andrew was Andrea were happy, and days that Andrew was Andrew were not happy.

In the summer before Kindergarten, again, they tried to get Andrew to play as a boy, and that didn’t sit well.  Mark took his fishing (and Andrew said that was a boy’s activity).  They took a week vacation in the Black Hills - but he insisted on taking some girl clothes.  Marci somehow convinced Andrew that blue jeans could be both boys or girls.  Andrew said, “but girl jeans have stuff on the back pockets” (meaning designs).

By second grade, the daily battles over clothes had become normal.  Marci and Mark were pushed to the limit.  They had talked with the counselor a million times (well, more like 30 times) and the consensus was “Let’s see what happens if for a year we can let Andrew be Andrea”)

Where he was barely getting by in first grade as he learned to read and do math; as Andrea in second grade, he was becoming a very good reader and a very good student.  Those little behavioral problems from Kindergarten and First Grade seemed to go away. 

Marci and Mark talked with Andrea’s second-grade teacher throughout the year.  The teacher (Mrs. Wolfram) knew the situation but called the child Andrea.  There had been some teasing the first week, but Andrea ignored it and played with the girls at lunch and recess.  

More counseling, more angst over Andrea or Andrew.  On a Saturday morning when she could put on any clothes it was always girl clothes.  And, on Sunday for Church, it was Andrea who sat next to Caleb, Marci, and Mark in the church pew and it was Andrea in the Sunday School class.  

More counseling.  Was Andrew really Andrea in her brain?  Was she really transgender? 

It seemed as if Andrea was happy, and Andrew was sad - that Andrea was hopefully and loving, and Andrew was morose and bitter.  

By third grade, their child was Andrea - every day, every day as a girl, every day with girl clothes.  Sure, the child was an almost typical third grader, but she was excelling in her school work, she interacted well with the girls in the class (and seemed to ignore the boys).  Marci and Mark had worked with a Girl Scout troop in Milbank and Andrea was accepted as a Girl Scout.  (And, for events like sleepovers, Marci joined Andrei.  

Using the restroom at school was generally okay as the girl’s restroom had doors to the stall.  

Fourth and Fifth grades went well with their child as Andrea.  Middle School got to be a problem as Andrea wanted to play on the girl's basketball team.  With some battles and heavy discussions, Andrea did NOT play basketball, or softball, or any sports.  She did play clarinet in the band.  

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At age 18, Andrea was prescribed feminizing hormones and at age 22, Andrea had “Gender Reconstruction Surgery” and also she couldn’t have children, she was a “functioning” female.  Her birth certificate was changed, her driver’s license, and all of the documents were in her name.  She married a nice man, Carter Oswald, and they adopted two children.  (Carter did know Andrea’s history, and they did enjoy sex, but without children).  And, Andrea was happy - and a great mother and wife.

**** 

Andrea was now 31, and Marci was in the South Dakota House of Representatives.  There was a lot of rhetoric about allowing or banning transgender youth to play on the teams of their new gender.  It was going to be close.  Marci hadn’t shared her daughter’s story with others. It was such that Marci’s vote could decide the issue.

Marci, Mark, Caleb, and Andrea were all Lutheran, but this afternoon, Marci slipped away from the State Capitol and went to St. Mary’s Catholic Church to pray.  She knew St. Mary’s would be open for prayer.  Marci was remembering the wrist band she had worn as a teenager many years ago - WWJD - What Would Jesus Do.  

She thought of Jesus with the woman caught in adultery, the woman at the well, the woman who just touched the hem of His garment.  She thought of Jesus confronting Zacchaeus - a tax collector who climbed a tree to see Jesus. And, the establishment who made the rules and eventually killed Jesus.  

That afternoon, God talked to her heart.  And, she knew.

*****

The next day as the bill was being discussed, no - argued vehemently - on the floor of the House of Representatives, Marci had gotten permission to speak to the bill.  

She started “I gave birth to a son, Andrew; who now is Andrea, a wonderful woman, and the mother of two of my grandchildren.  Andrea would have loved to play girls basketball and softball but was banned from these activities”.  Marci went on and there was silence in the chamber.  On the final vote, the motion to NOT allow transgender children to play sports in their new gender failed by two votes.  (That is, transgender children would be allowed to play in the sport that matches this current gender). Marci was both harassed and praised.  At the next election, Marci faced opposition in her Milbank district.  She won by 70% to 30%.  

She went on to become a representative to the United States House of Representatives for two terms until she retired to be “Nana” for her grandchildren.  

*****

Friends, I don’t know how to describe love in this example.  This scene is playing out all over the United States.  Is this a “Civil Rights” issue?  Is this some liberal “folderol”?  Can a person's brain (and heart) say they are a man if they were born a woman? (Or that they are a woman if they were born a man?)

To me, this is a place for love, for prayer, for asking “What Would Jesus Do” (WWJD).  

***

I have been allowed to play on the Georgetown Fireants Granny Basketball team.  Yes, I’m probably the tallest player on the team - and yes, I’m probably the least talented on the team.  I like playing and I like my friends on the team.  I don’t push my background and I try to live “Love Wins”.  We haven’t started practice yet this year.  But, I’m looking forward to this activity!!!

LOVE DOES WIN!!

HUGS!!!

Karen