MONDAY, MARCH 22ND, 2021

 MONDAY, MARCH 22ND, 2021

Communication biases, judgments, tongue, gossip

Last week, I barely started on a THINK decision-making tool:

T - is it TRUE

H - is it HELPFUL

I - is it INSPIRING

N - is it NECESSARY

K - is it KIND

(Let’s throw in F - is it FAIR, and L - is it, LOVING)

First - is it true

https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/true-5-factchecking-websites/ 

In the 2020 Election, the term “Fake News” was used a lot.  I’ve gotten so I check stories that get sent to me.  Please, these are just examples - taken from the top of the list.

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(1) Claim by Kevin McCarthy (R): “Democrats have accomplished a lot in just 2 months … 1 Million energy jobs destroyed.”

PolitiFact Rating: Pants on Fire (120,000 jobs were lost due to the pandemic before Biden took office. The 1 million figure is an estimate if all oil and gas production was halted, which isn’t happening)

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(2) Claim by Barbara Dittrich (R): “Pot today is not the weed baby boomers were smoking.”

Politifact Rating: True (More potent with higher THC levels)

Yes, marijuana is stronger than it used to be

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Truth works in other ways.  Gossip.  “Did you hear about Elyse?  She shot several people!!”  (In this case, it might be true as Elyse is a nurse and I think she has been involved with COVID vaccinations.  

Sometimes the image after the fact sticks around well after the situation. Let's say Elyse is arrested for murder. People who know her say "I always knew she had it in her - and it was only a matter of time before she killed somebody". But, after the accusation, it is proved 100% false. But, in my eyes, Elyse is a murderer.

“Gossip usually involves love, relationships, sex, and other issues that people usually do not talk about publicly. Additionally, gossip almost always causes pain and humiliation for the person it is about. People share gossip without any thought of how it might impact the person it is about.”

I have a friend that I haven’t seen for three years that loved to gossip.  It made her important - she knew things about people - now whether the things she “knew” were right or wrong, it seemingly didn’t matter.  I don’t know if she got all the things on the internet or watched some of the Access Hollywood-type gossip shows.  (Or, buy the gossip magazines at the grocery store - which seem to announce some famous people are getting divorced or having extra-marital affairs).

Most gossip is intended to hurt others.  I’ll admit that I have at times like hearing gossip - wow - I know something nasty about another person!!!  But, in the last few years, I’ve turned to the concept that “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all”.  I am to love others.

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The second point is “H” - is it helpful?”  (Or is the communication intended to hurt?)

In the “False News” above, item (1) is both not true and not helpful.  It is intended to damage a person’s reputation.

But, in False News (2), the statement is true (about marijuana) and helps understand the growth of weed in America.

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In my communication I want my thoughts to be helpful and encouraging!!!

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Item #3 is “Inspiring” 

I am finding it hard to make all my communications “inspiring”!!!  (Even when I “preach”!!!)  

The definition of “Inspire” I am using is “fill (someone) with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.”.  I don’t necessarily think I am giving you the desire to do something creative.  It might apply to me as I’m trying to do more creative Saturday Stories and Sunday Funday activities.  

When I taught, I think I tried to be inspiring!!!  Inspiring and challenging my students to reach higher and grow stronger.  Maybe I’m trying to challenge you to think?

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Item #4 is “is the communication Necessarily”.

Maybe this is more like “is this communication good.  I like visiting with my friends (say LMG) and it might not be that I have anything special to communicate with her, but communication builds rapport and relationships between friends.  

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Item #5 is “Is it “KIND”

There is another hate in the world - Democrats hating Republicans, Republicans hating Democrats, Conservatives against Liberals, Liberals against Conservatives, Christians against Atheists, Atheists against Christians.  (and even internal Baptists against other Baptists, Catholics against other Catholics, Democrats against other Democrats - etc.  )

Let’s get rid of hateful talk and communication.  

Ephesians 4:29 “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what helps build others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”

I have this vision.  I’m sitting in an anteroom to heaven - and a movie of me is playing - with me dissing other people, being nasty, being unloving and unlovable.  And, I am wincing at every action and every word.  And, I know that I said every one of those things.  “I have sinned in my thoughts, words, and deeds”.

LOVE WINS

HUGS

Karen