On Saturdays, I write fiction. (I’m hoping that “practice makes perfect” <grin>). Today I’m starting a new series - Celeste.
*****
I met Celeste when she was 90 years old and in the Fair-Oaks Retirement Center. I was a chaplain and stopped to greet her. I visited her twice a week for four years until I was reassigned to a different facility. I still visited her at least once a month until her tragic death at age 98. About two years into my twice-a-week visits, she trusted me enough to share her story with me. The version below is my transcription of her life. The first few stories were from my memory, but then I asked, and she gave me permission to record the stories. But, I do believe that my notes were accurate.
Celeste Rail was a delightful senior lady and as I visited her I was enthralled by her honesty, sincerity, and her accuracy.
*****
I first remember my travels when I was about seven years old. I was walking home from second grade at Cleveland Elementary School with my friend Shelley. It was September in Prairie du Chien - cool, but not cold, and the trees hadn’t changed color yet. We were walking south on Wacouta Avenue. At Dunn Street, I said “Bye” to Shelley as she went west toward Beaumont Avenue, and I continued south on Wacouta towards Taylor street.
I was walking on the west side of Wacouta, opposite St. John’s Catholic Church, when I saw the poster for the first time. I walked this way pretty much every day and the poster was stapled to the fence outside 705 South Wacouta Avenue. The fence was there to keep the yappy dogs from barking at people on the sidewalk. The fence had a redwood stain and I couldn’t see over the top of it. The poster was for the Annual Prairie du Chien Knights of Columbus carnival to be held at the Crawford County fairground in two weeks. I knew it was coming and I had been saving my allowance to be able to ride a few of the rides.
But, something was different. As I looked at the poster, the clown’s mouth moved and said “Celeste”.
Immediately I turned to the poster and asked “What did you say?”. I did hear what the poster said, but … posters don’t talk.
The clown’s eyes now focused on me, “I said, ‘Celeste’. That is your name, isn’t it?”
I answered, “Of course, that is my name. And, who are you?”.
The clown answered, “I’m Pearl the clown”.
That confused me. I guess I had thought very naively that all clowns were male. I looked again at the poster. The clown had shoulder-length blue, sparkly hair. Yes, I guess clowns could be girls. My parents had said “Don’t talk with strangers”, but this wasn't a real person, this was a clown on a poster. So, I guess I could talk with Pearl, the poster clown.
I said, rather directly, “You’re a poster clown, you can’t talk”.
Pearl answered me, “Who said so? I sure can talk - I’m talking to you aren’t I?”
As I watched, Pearl’s lips moved in agreement with the sounds coming out of her mouth. Her eyes blinked, her head moved a little and that pretty sparkly blue hair moved.
Then I had an idea. “Okay, if you are a carnival clown, can you give me tickets for the carnival?”.
Pearl gave me a hard look, that slowly softened and she said “Okay”. She stepped out of the poster for a minute and came back with coupons for ten free rides. I knew they were real as I’d seen them before. My dad had tickets like this to sell in advance of the carnival to raise money for the Knights of Columbus. She handed the tickets to me out of the poster. Her hand brushed me, and it seemed real. I took the tickets out of her hand.
Remembering my manners, I said “Thank you, Pearl”, to the poster clown. Pearl smiled and said, “You’re welcome”. Then, not knowing what else to say, I said “I need to head home now”.
Pearl answered, “It was nice talking to you, Celeste”.
Then it hit me. “How did you know my name?”
Pearl answered, “You were at the carnival last year and I remember you.”
I guessed that worked out. I didn’t really remember talking to carnival clowns, but maybe they heard my mother or brother call out my name.
I said, “Okay, bye”.
Pearl answered, “Bye”.
I went on down the block to Taylor street and went east a block to my house on the corner of Taylor and Michigan.
*****
My mother worked at the Prairie du Chien high school as a math teacher. Back in those days, if I got home before she did, I could have a snack, and watch TV for a while. My brother, Mike, was three years older and he was generally about 15 minutes after I got home.
I put the carnival tickets on my dresser and then thought about that. What would Tim (my brother), or Mom or Dad say when they saw the tickets? Would Dad think I stole them from him? How would I say “I got them from the Pearl, the poster clown across from St. John’s church”? So, I tucked them away in the pocket of some jeans in my closet. If I used the tickets for free, Dad would ask where I got the money to buy them. Mom would say she didn’t give me money for them. But, I really wanted to ride the rides at the carnival.
I thought I could take them to school and sell them to other girls for half price, then I could have
the money to spend at the carnival and if I got lucky, nobody would know I took an extra ride or got some cotton candy. And, if Mom asked me where I got the extra money, I could … I could lie about it. (Then she would know and I’d really get in trouble for lying.)
I had an idea. I could ask Pearl, the poster clown, tomorrow how to get out of the dilemma. After all, she gave me the tickets (not quite good logic as I had asked for the tickets). Mike wasn’t home yet. I could sneak out and go back to Pearl before he got home, or wait until he was at home, eating his snack and watching TV. I could say I needed to check on something with a friend and then run up and ask Pearl. It was only two blocks away. I could take the tickets and give them back to Pearl. Yeah, that sounded good.
I went out our back door, through the neighbor's back yard, alongside St. John’s Church, and crossed the street to the poster. Pearl was still there, but she wasn’t moving.
I said, “Hi Pearl, are you there?”
There was no answer. Was she taking a break? Did I imagine that I talked with her and she gave me tickets? No, I did physically have the tickets. Oh my. What to do?
As I was about to leave the poster and go home, Pearl said “Hi Celeste” - but then she stopped and froze in place. Two other kids were walking down Wacouta Avenue towards me and the poster. Pearl said quickly and quietly, “I can’t talk now”.
Then, darn it, Tim came walking down the sidewalk. “Hey squirt, what's cha doing?”
I answered, “Just looking at the carnival poster.”
“Yeah, it's going to be fun this year. I’m going to knock down the bottles and win a stuffed teddy bear this year. I’ve been practicing.”
I had seen him in the yard throwing baseballs at a mesh target and thought he was just wasting time, but now I understood.
I knew I couldn’t just stand there, so I turned around and walked home with my brother, Tim.
*****
The two weeks had almost passed. Either Pearl, the carnival clown wasn’t talking to me, or when she seemed to be alive, somebody came along the sidewalk. The carnival was to start in two days. What was I going to do with the tickets? I thought about just dropping the tickets in the poster, but the poster was solid - no matter where I touched the poster, it didn’t move. It was just a poster attached to a wooden fence.
On the day before the carnival, I had said “Goodbye” to Shelley and thought glumly I’d stop by the poster for the last time. And, this time, Pearl was there and said “Hey Celeste! Long time no see. What’s up? Are you ready for the carnival?”
I almost cried - both sad tears since I knew I couldn’t lie about how I got the tickets, and happy tears that Pearl was back in the poster.
“I (sob) can’t take the tickets. Mom and Dad will ask me where I got them, and if I tell them the truth, they’ll think I’m making it up, and if I lie and say something like somebody gave them to me, they’ll ask me who gave them to me.”
I said “Here” and thrust the tickets into the poster into Pearl’s hands. My heart did the two-way flip - happy that I didn’t have to lie, and sad that I couldn’t ride as many rides as I wanted.
Pearl’s eyes grew warm looking and her smile brightened up the poster.
“Celeste, there are tough decisions to make in life. I’m glad you made this one the right way. God bless you”.
Something about her comment did put peace in my heart. Maybe I did the right thing.
*****
The next day was Saturday and we went to the carnival, along with most of the kids from my school and from town. It was crowded. I rode the Ferris Wheel, and Mom allowed me to ride the Octopus - those were my two rides. Then a clown with bright blue hair came up to Mom and said “What a pretty daughter you have”.
Mom agreed and said, “She is a sweet girl”.
The clown said, “I think she might like a couple more rides”, and she gave Mom four tickets. She said, “I think she’d like to have you sit next to her on the Ferris Wheel”.
Mom thanked the clown (who winked at me when Mom turned away).
*****
On the Ferris Wheel, I hugged Mom’s hand and sat real close to her. Then I gave the last two tickets to her and Dad and they both went together on the Scrambler.
*****
The poster stayed up a few more days until some kids tore it down. I was sure that Pearl winked at me every time I passed the poster. And, I winked back.
*****
Friday is our weekly spelling quiz. I guess I’m an average speller. I was taking my quiz and was stuck on a word. I was looking up at a poster in the classroom - and suddenly the letters to my word started appearing in the poster. “M”,”O”, “S”, “Q”, “U”, “I”, “T”, and “O” - mosquito. I checked my spelling. I had two Ss - like in moss that grows on trees. I crossed it out and put in the correct spelling. Mrs. Freund was looking at me, but I wasn’t looking at any other students’ papers - I was looking at the poster that was encouraging success.
I got in trouble that day for talking in class. Shelley and I had to stay after and clean erasers and the desktops. Shelley took the erasers outside and pounded them together to get the dust out of them. I was given a spray bottle and sprayed each desk and wiped it down. Some desks had writing and I had to really scrub them to get them clean.
I was next to the poster, Mrs. Freund was out of the room, and Shelley was outside with the erasers. I looked at the poster and whispered “Thank you”. The poster changed and a grandmotherly woman showed up in the poster frame and said “I thought you were having some trouble with that word”. She had a big smile and did remind me of my grandma Sloan.
So, my second poster spoke to me - was I imagining it? But it seemed real.
“Hi”, I said, “I’m Celeste”.
The lady in the poster smiles that warm grandmotherly smile again and said, “I’m Opal. I’ve been watching you this year, Celeste”.
I asked, “Are you a teacher?”
Opal laughed, “Yes, many years and many students ago. I was the teacher of the year for Wisconsin some time ago and they made a poster of me - and here I am”.
“What did you teach?” I asked.
Opal said, “I was a second-grade teacher in Fennimore. I never married and I loved all my students - smart and not so smart”.
I said, “I think you are pretty just like my grandma Helen”.
Opal blushed and said, “You are so sweet Celeste. I hear Mrs. Freud is almost at door, so I’ll talk to you later. Bye”.
It was a fun year with Opal in the room. I asked Shelley if she ever looked at the poster and if she thought it changed.
“Huh? Posters changing? You’re nuts, Celeste”.
So, maybe I was the only one who could see Opal.
I asked to stay after school to help with cleaning the room. Mrs. Freud thought I was being nice and helpful, but I wanted to see Opal in the poster!
Opal showed me how to make a good paper airplane and do Origami with paper. One day she was playing a clarinet and she passed the clarinet to me through the poster and I tried to play some notes. I didn’t do very well, but Opal said I was much better than the first time she had played the oboe.
One day, she gave me a clarinet and the book “Beginning Clarinet”. She said, “You are going to be a great musician - so you can practice with this. Just tell your parents somebody donated it to the school and you ended up with it”.
I took it home and before Mom arrived I took it out of its case and tried a few notes. I got some squawks and weird sounds, but by the time she got home, I was able to make a few notes.
Mom asked where I got the clarinet and I told her. And the story WAS true, it was donated to the school and I ended up with it. I read the book and got pretty good with it.
For show and tell at the end of the year, I brought my clarinet and played Fur Elise for the class. Mrs. Freund was very impressed. I told her that a friend had given me the clarinet and I had been practicing. I looked quickly at the poster and Opal was beaming at me!!
That was a day that I stayed after class to clean the erasers. Opal said “That was amazing Celeste. Do you know that your name is that of a musical instrument?”
“I didn’t know that”, I replied.
Opal continued, “You did so well today. I’m proud of you. Come here by my poster.”
I did and Opal leaned out and kissed me on the cheek. It was so sweet!!!
*****
To be continued
*****
LOVE WINS
Karen White
July 30, 2022
