Confidence - part I

Confidence

https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/281874

First, from the Sound of Music.  Maria is heading to the Trapp family home and is scared about facing seven children   Early in the song she bemoans: “Now here I'm facing adventure.  Then why am I so scared?  A captain with seven children - what's so fearsome about that?  Oh, I must stop these doubts, All these worries. If I don't I just know I'll turn back!  I must dream of the things I am seeking. I am seeking the courage I lack.

“With each step I am more certain,
Everything will turn out fine.
I have confidence,
The world can all be mine!
They'll have to agree
I have confidence in me.

“I have confidence in sunshine,
I have confidence in rain.
I have confidence that spring will come again!
Besides what you see I have confidence in me.”

Last fall as I was teaching statistics, I lost my confidence.  (Lots of reasons, but I fell flat on my face).  

Parallel story:

I was taking a professional course from IBM many years ago.  The instructor was asked a question and he blew an easy question.  Before long, the class was like sharks smelling blood in the water. More questions and eventually the lead instructor called for a break.  [Aside, later we learned that for some IBM positions having a teaching background is important to get promoted.]

I’m not sure if my students sensed my lack of confidence.  But, I became tentative and lost the class!!!

So, from the linked article - 10 Things to Boost Self-Confidence

-1 Visualize yourself as you want to be.
In the Sound of Music, Maria is visualizing herself as a successful governess.

-2 Affirm yourself
Maria affirms “I have confidence in me”!!  You need to say, “I CAN DO IT”.  

As kids, we read the Little Golden Book of “The Little Engine that Could”.  The little engine affirmed, “I think I can, I think I can”.  

-3 Do one thing a day that scares you!!

I recently read a book that had a term of “OBTAD” - One Big Thing a Day!!  You build confidence by getting out of your comfort zone!!

(Okay, true confessions.  I am NOT a big phone person.  I think it came from my childhood, where phone service (especially long-distance) was expensive. You older people might remember the concept of making a collect call for yourself to your parents - which was a signal that you were on the way.  Then, living in a dorm room where there was one phone per floor - and if you answered the phone you would have to find the person that was being called and bring them to the phone. Even now, I will text, email, message, but rarely phone!!

-4 Question your inner critic

The article has this quote: ““You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” 

This is like the personal affirmations - YOU CAN DO IT!!!

-5 Take the 100 days of rejection challenge!!

It was new to me!!

The the concept is to learn how to accept rejection.  The article states, “Jia Jiang has become famous for recording his experience of “busting fear” by purposefully making crazy requests of people in order to be rejected over 100 days. His purpose was to desensitize himself to rejection after he became more upset than he expected over rejection from a potential investor. Busting fear isn’t easy to do, but if you want to have fun while building up your self-confidence, this is a powerful way to do it.

If you are (for example) a salesman, you will get rejected frequently.  Or (personal note), I had to write and submit journal articles.  It was part of my life - write, submit, and get rejected or accepted (or accepted with editing).  Rejections were part of my life - and I never enjoyed being rejected.  For some journals, the acceptance rate was like 15%.  Out of 100 submissions, only 15 got accepted!!!  There was a huge probability that my article would be rejected.  I sometimes got almost paralyzed - before submitting an article, and after getting rejected.  

We have heard of authors who submit manuscripts to many publishers before getting published. 

So, be confident in yourself!!

More on this tomorrow!!

Stand tall, believe in yourself!!

Hugs!!

Karen