WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 8, 2021 LESSONS LEARNED FROM MY TRIP - PART III

 WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 8, 2021 LESSONS LEARNED FROM MY TRIP - PART III

Last week when I got home from my trip to Phoenix Arizona (actually, the town of Surprize Arizona), I was tired and down - and that put me in a downward spiral of funk (and junk).

In the previous two days, I’ve given two lessons I learned from that trip.

One - I need to be in corporate worship.  I need to be in Church.  I had skipped Church for three weeks, with my last attendance of November 7th.  As they say “Seven Days without God makes one weak” (note spelling), I was weak.

Two - I learned to watch my self-talk.  I was talking myself down - I said I felt like crap (and didn’t use that word).  I was tired.  I must have Covid.  Instead of saying “Rest up a few days and life will be so much better!!!”

So, today, part I of “Trusting in God” (Karen style).

*****

I was asked to leave my house in October 2018 and moved to a small apartment in Georgetown Texas.  I was worried about money.  I (that is the royal “I” - me, myself, and I) had saved upon money for us to retire on.  But, now we were running two households.  The expenses on the other end haven’t gone away - and maybe even are higher. Property taxes are the major way of the State of Texas getting income - and property taxes are up on the house.  Meaning while each year my rent has increased significantly.  I have been very frugal,  (Okay, it is December in Texas and I haven’t turned on the heat yet.  The last time I used air conditioning was in September, so about three months of living with the thermometer off!!  (All electric - no gas).

My rent was going up last summer, my cable bill was going up last summer (and I don’t have television), other expenses were going up.  And, my (royal) I said “I need more income (and to spend less).

Philippians 4:19 “ And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” 

Psalm 37:25 :I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread. 

What part about trusting in God.  I proclaim it - I “believe” it - except when I don’t believe it.  

“Oh sweet Pollyanna Karen, will God provide for you?”  Pollyanne Karen “But of course.” And, when I run out of assets, God will take me home!!”  

I think I am believe in 2 Karen chapter 1, verse 5 “God helps those who help themselves”. (Yes, there is no such verse).  

So, I take this “little” part-time job - four evenings a week - about five hours a night, about $65 dollars a night ($13 an hour), and thus about $800 a month (I don’t work four evenings every week).  

Just a little “icing on the cake” - just enough to “get me by”.  Just enough to get ahead on those jumping expenses, just ahead of getting a few things I “need” (oops - things that I wanted - hey maybe I can activate that television set that is gathering dust in my bedroom).

But, I come home from this part-time job drained of my energy.  And, instead of working on building up my energy (which I used to do at the Georgetown COmmunity Recreation Center by walking four miles a day), I’m not doing this for my health!!.  

This last week after returning from my trip, I didn’t want to go back to work.  My self-talk was “You don’t need the money”, “You aren’t trusting in God”, “Give it up”.

I’m doing the wrong thing if I profess a God faith.  I am trying to hedge my bets.  Hey if God Meets my needs - hurray, and if God don’t meet my needs - that’s okay, I helped myself!!!  

But, when I finally got back to work (about four days ago), It felt so good.   The seniors (all except one are over 90 years old), appreciated having me back.  I’m helping them out.  They “need” me.  (Well, maybe not me - but they need somebody to be cheery and to smile and encourage them.)

Now, if I could step back to maybe three nights a week or two nights a week - maybe I could get my balance again.  

*****

Trusting in God

In the past few years I’ve worked on what faith means to me.  An infinite God - that I don’t really comprehend - He/She/It is so far above me that I am so weak and finite, and He is so awesome.  

Am I saying that I can’t really trust God in money?  Can I trust God to Love Me?  Can I trust God to be part of my inner strength - my inner convictions.  I say LOVE WINS - but am I cutting out God from that equation?  

Cmon Karen, trust God with your money too.  I’m too much like my grandchildren when they were younger,  “Mine”, “Mine”, “Mine”.  

It isn’t mine (money that is).  I can’t take it with me.  I hope to give all of whatever I have away.  Give, Give, Give.  Love, Love, Love!!!

If I have a real philosophy, if LOVE WINS is to be more than just words, then I have to focus on it.  

“God, help me to LOVE YOU, and help me to LOVE OTHERS”!!!  

Karen