SATURDAY JULY 24, 2021 - SATURDAY STORY

(The scenario came two weeks ago- July 13th) 

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Grandma is a conservative Christian, she voted for Donald Trump in the 2020 election.  Granddaughter Morgan is quite a bit different than Grandma.  Morgan is a lesbian and lives with her partner.  They are in the process of adopting a little girl.  Morgan is an art studio in her own right as her body has many tattoos and piercings.  And, Morgan no longer goes to any church, although she is quite spiritual. 

Most of Morgan’s antics have lessened when she graduated from college and took a position as an art teacher at Edina High School in Edina, Minnesota.  Some of her art work has been displayed in exhibits in the Twin Cities, and she has sold some of her paintings and other artwork.  She was a runner-up in the annual Ducks Unlimited Print contest. 

Grandma doesn’t approve of Morgan’s lifestyle and has written out of her will.  Morgan would like to get to know her Grandmother more, but isn’t allowed to visit - and communication is difficult.  

But deep in Morgan’s heart, Morgan wants to reconcile with her grandma.  She remembers Nana loving her as a toddler, coming to gymnastic events, band, choir, and soccer games.  She loves her Nana and has tried to reconcile with her in the past.  Morgan believes that LOVE WINS (she must have been reading my blog).  This has become almost an obsession

Her dad is Nana’s son - and communicates to Morgan about her grandma.  Dad has told Morgan that her email notes to Grandma get deleted.  Physical mail cards are torn up and thrown in the trash.  If Morgan calls Grandma, Grandma will hang up. 

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Last week on Tuesday, Dad told Morgan that Grandma was going to have a knee replacement on Friday July 16.  Since it was summer, Morgan’s time was open.  Morgan does have some commissioned work from the University of Minnesota, from a new building for Minnesota National Resources, and others.  

So, on Friday July 16, Morgan was at Fairview-Southdale Hospital by 10 a.m.  She estimated that Nana would be in surgery for most of the morning, but she planned on getting into Nana’s hospital room and being there for the day.  She packed a sketchbook, knitting, her iPhone loaded with music and a bag of goodies - for her and for Nana.  This was going to be kind of a “make or break” day for her reconciliation with her grandma.  Morgan hadn’t changed her name - which was the same as her father’s and Nana -Morgan Miller - and she thought that would help her gain entry to Nana’s room.  

Morgan checked in with a receptionist and learned that Nana’s surgery went well and she was in recovery now and would be in her regular hospital room in an hour.  She was directed to a family waiting room and they would let her know when she could visit. The receptionist said grandma would be resting most of the day, but would have times when she was awake.  And, the receptionist said it would be just great for Morgan to spend the day with her grandmother.

About an hour-and-one-half later, the receptionist came to Morgan and said she could go to her grandmother’s room (#723).  She did and there was a nurse checking Nana’s vital signs.  Nana was hooked up to an IV and was vaguely awake.  

Morgan said to the nurse “Hi, I’m Morgan Miller and I’m here to sit with my grandmother today”.  The nurse smiled knowing that recovery goes better when a family member or friend keeps the patient from focusing on their pain.  The nurse said “That is great. She'll be dozing off and on today.  We might try to get her up and walking with a walker later today, and you can be helpful then.”

Then Morgan said “Good Morning Nana.  I love you.  I’m going to spend the day with you”.

Nana first looked pleased and then something back in her brain must have suggested that this was the problem grandchild.  Morgan anticipated this and planted a kiss on Nana’s forehead and squeezed her hand.  That seemed to disarm Nana.

The nurse whispered to Morgan as she left the room “She might be a little groggy today.  Be patient, she’ll come around”.

Morgan lingered over those words “Be patient, she’ll come around”.  It had been five years since Nana had rejected her.  She had been patient, and today, she was expecting love to reappear.  Again, she thought of ‘love wins’.  Even behind all the evil, strained relationships, love does win, she believed.

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Over the next few hours, Nana was awake and asleep.  She did get a low calorie / low fat lunch (Nana was borderline diabetic), and Morgan helped her with some of the soft items (applesauce, pudding), when Nana was awake.  Nada didn’t want to talk much to Morgan, but Morgan took this in stride.  She carried on a light banner - like the artwork she was working on for the University of Minnesota.  It was to be a mural of students being transformed by education - with a big broad, blue sky.  Then she talked of her commission for the Minnesota Natural Resources - a lake view with egrets, loons, eagles, a few shy bears behind trees, and on the far side of the lake a group of small boats of fishermen. Pretty typical Minnesota natural resources mural.

At times Nana fell asleep.  Morgan sat next to her - sometimes holding her hand, sometimes softly saying to the unconscious woman “I love you Nana”.  One time when she was fully awake, she accusatively asked “Why are you here?” 

Morgan deflected the question by saying “Because I love you”.  Her grandmother said “harrumph” under her breath.  Morgan looked at her Nana and smiled.  She pulled out her sketch pad and showed her some of the drawings she was working on this morning.  And, Nana did look at the pictures and even commented “I like that” on a couple of sketches.  

Morgan asked her questions like “are you hurting?” “Do you want some ice water?” “Do you want to rest for a while?” “Are you comfortable?”  “Do you want a blanket?”.  

Nana went back to sleep.  At various times the nurses came in to take grandma’s vital signs and check up on her.  About 4:30, the doctor stopped by to see how his patient was coming.  He looked at Morgan and suggested that later the two of them could take a short walk together.  He wanted his patient to get up and move.  After some dinner, a physical therapy assistant came over and Nana, Morgan and Curtis (the assistant), did some walking.  Nana was slow and hadn’t used a walker before so the progress was slow.   But, she was up and moving.  

About 6:30, Morgan’s Dad and Mom (Tom and Jeanine Wilson) came to visit.  Dad was a little surprised to see Morgan there.  Nana started with “I don’t know why she is here.” - followed by a long pause and a very low voice she continued “but, I’m glad she was here today.” (A blush came to Morgan’s face at that comment.  

Later the speaker system announced it was the end of visiting hours.  Dad and Mom kissed Nana goodbye, and Morgan did the same but with a whisper in Nana’s ear “I love you Nana, I forgive you.  Sleep well and I’ll see you tomorrow.”  

They left Nana and walked out to the parking garage together.  Dad had a smile as he asked Morgan about spending the day with Nana.  She answered “It was my pleasure”.

And, back in the hospital room, Nana had a warm feeling as she thought about Morgan being there!!!   

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Epilogue

Morgan did go back the next two days and then she volunteered to take Nana to her physical therapy appointments since she could adapt her schedule better.  

And, about a week later, on a drive home from physical therapy, Nana turned to Morgan and said “I’m sorry for hating you.” again a long pause and then “I was wrong and I do love you”!!

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Comment:  So, yes, of course, a Pollyanna story today - but reconciliation and healing of relationships can occur - but it does take love, time, and desire to reconcile.  In the story, Morgan had a captive audience who couldn’t get away.  Over the years, I’ve heard a strange way to spell the word love - it is “T  I  M  E”!!!

May you grow in your love, and reconcile with those that aren’t as close as they should be!!

LOVE WINS!!!

Karen